Alternative Energy Brainstorming with Billionaires

(April 11, 2024) Welcome all! Thank you for joining me in my secret underwater bubble retreat overlooking the Mariana Trench. Please make yourselves comfortable — I only ask that you not tap on the...

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Wishful Weed for 2024

(March 14, 2024) Ladeez Nite. Girlfriends, it can be tough to keep the fabulous vibes going when the people who want to define you solely by your reproductive organs also want to...

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Is Zopissa Right for You?

(January 18, 2024) Always take Zopissa as directed. Like the people in this ad, while laughing in a park with a non-threateningly diverse group of friends in colorful clothing. Or in full makeup...

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The Cat Has Made Some Resolutions

(January 4, 2024) Good morning. Well, good pre-dawn. Here, let me bat your face to help you wake up. That's probably as much as your weak human eyes will adjust to the dark...

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We Need to Stop AI Before it Replaces Tech CEOs Like Me

(December 7, 2023) Let me start by saying nobody is a bigger believer in technology and innovation than I am. But just like you, average person, I sometimes sit in my aqua-bubble fallout...

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Tales from the CryptTok

(October 26, 2023) Timestamp: Sept. 20, 2023 Location: Trinidad, CA Hey Grave Babies, it's me, Shyla, your favorite tomb raider! I know it's been a few weeks since I posted but I've been...

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I Love Fall and COVID is Not Ruining It, Dammit

(October 5, 2023) The scent of leaves, crisp air, it's fall — my favorite season and roughly a third of my personality. Oh, you like fall, too? That's cute. I keep a dedicated room...

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FAQ About Your Changing Body

(August 31, 2023) It's been a challenge putting together an FAQ that works in every state and doesn't squick out Ron DeSantis. But we can still offer vital health information for growing children...

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Zoo Animal Council Meeting Minutes

(June 15, 2023) On April 22, the Ferndale City Council voted against a proposed kindness resolution, the scaled back version of an earlier anti-hate resolution. Giraffe: The next item is the proposed Anti-Shit-Throwing...

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An Invitation from All-Alpha Pack Coaching

(March 30, 2023) Being an Alpha male was simpler when early Homo sapiens man threw on an animal skin, grabbed a cool club and hunted for survival. He had one skin, maybe like,...

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Wishful Weed Strains for 2023

(March 16, 2023) Weed Who Must Not Be Named. Who knew we'd need a Patronus against J.K. Rowling? Here to aid you in the defense against dark transphobes is a Potions Master's concoction...

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Wytch Wellness™

(January 19, 2023) Everyone wishes there was a magic potion for wellness and at Wytch Wellness™, there is! If you're ready to commit (for eternity), we can help you transform your life, ditch...

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Personal Rebranding for 2023

(January 5, 2023) As I look back at resolutions past, I see a disheartening pattern of vows and good habits tossed aside before Valentine's Day, along with blank journals, gym membership cards, rattling...

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The Elf on the Shelf is Begging You Not to Put Him Out This Year

(December 8, 2022) That time of year already? Ha, seems like only yesterday you stuffed me in here with the Christmas stockings. Not that I mind! In fact, if I'm totally honest, by...

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New Starbucks Holiday Drinks

(November 24, 2022) With our iconic Pumpkin Spice Latte and Peppermint Mocha, Starbucks owns the holiday beverage, but you can't rest on your laurels in this business. That means our team is...

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