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Gloriously defying conventional wisdom, Sohotshe Burns (known on earth as Wendy Burns) was crowned the 2012 Rutabaga Queen before a raucous crowd at Arcata's Portuguese Hall on Saturday Night. In the end, the much hyped, "Year of the 'Picker" was not to be. Next year, Johnny. Next year.

Queen Sohotshe will go on to be the royal face and head cheerleader for this year's Kinetic Grand Championship next weekend.

The annual Rutabaga Ball was (as always) a colorful, over-the-top affair, as evidenced by the oddness below. (Click pics to biggify.)

Johnny BerryPicker gives his entourage pre-pageant instructions.

The Kinetic Queens about to drop some judgment, yo.

The SS Hobart saves Johnny from, uh, drowning in the Bay? That was it, right?

Soap opera star Sohotshe Burns seduces lots o' mens.

Queens Mo Betta and Texas ham it.

Queen candidate Kitty Lanai exhibits her talent.

Johnny BerryPicker shows his appreciation for the (apparently useless) Journal bump.

Off with their heads!

Everybody dance now!

Despite technical difficulties, Sohotshe and Co. proved that the heat was indeed on.

2011 Queen G-Ma about to declare her sucessor.

!!!

G-Ma uses her Werthers Original-encrusted lips to welcome the new royalty into the sisterhood.

Queen Monica comforts the defeated Johnny BerryPicker.

Kinetic Spirit reigns!

Oh ... and there was also a party ...

G-Ma mugs.

Gabe Pressure mean mugs.

Queenage.

Queen Emma is tough on a crown.

Eyes Anonymous channel the '80s.

Mo.

Next week: more of this!