Hi. My name is Able. I was once a magnificent red abalone. Now I’m just a junk bowl on the desk of the dipshit who normally writes this column. I contain some presumably reusable toothpicks, an expired condom, probably a raisin and a smelly glass pipe. And my partner here is a red abalone shell […]
shells
Posted inLife + Outdoors
Nuttall’s Cockle Fight
I have a shady-looking new neighbor. I’m pretty sure he slashed my tires — just because we like different sports teams. He’s that kind. I’m sure he’s also the one buying liquor and pornography for the neighborhood children and teaching them to steal my mail. He’s scum and I told my friends that I’d kick […]
Posted inNews
HumBug: New Spirals
I think the best and most frustrating thing about nature study is that one thing almost always leads to several more, and each one of those leads to still more. I have a particular fondness for glowing things, especially our local glow worms, Pterotus obscuripinnes. Studying them I learned they feed almost exclusively on small […]