On Saturday, May 21, the Kinetic cognoscenti gathered for the annual Rutabaga Ball at the Arcata Community Center. There, royal hopefuls competed in lavish costumes, singing, dancing, skating and bribing judges for a chance to join the ranks of the Rutabaga Queens and preside over the impending Kinetic Grand Championship this weekend. The queens — fulfilling their lifetime appointments, because this isn’t the easy retirement papacy, people — sat in judgement, swimming in swag, finally bestowing the crown upon Princess PoiSin Candie, she of the roller skates and pink hair. Kneel before your new queen, Humboldt, and tremble at her glory.
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This article appears in The Defender.
