This week we’re grabbing extra napkins and celebrating Burger Week at local restaurants. And we’ve got a salty story on local jellyfish. Hit subscribe for weekly updates on Humboldt stories.
jellyfish
Posted inLife + Outdoors
Purple Jellies of Doom
Hi there. I’m a stranger from the future here to beg you to stop reading these Washed Up stories. The asshole who writes them made a vast fortune by bilking his readers. Then he became another one of those tedious billionaires who buy their way into political power and do a bunch of stupid stuff. […]
Posted inLife + Outdoors
Sea Nettle Babymaking
A local grocery store was overstocked, so they had a big sale. When I arrived, the place was packed with people having sex and grabbing groceries. People were even rolling around in shopping carts having sex and stuffing groceries in with them. Things I won’t describe were happening in the produce section. And there were […]
Posted inLife + Outdoors
Moon Jellies for Breakfast
We at Washed-up Foods Inc. are preparing to launch our first breakfast cereal. It’s called Sugar Frosted Moon Flakes. It’s made from our local moon jelly (Aurelia aurita), one of the jellyfish species harvested for human consumption. Dried jellies are used in several Asian cuisines, and are high in protein and low in fat, but […]
Posted inLife + Outdoors
The Name of the Blob
On a beach somewhere, a colorful blob is washing up and ignorant parents are calling it “a jellyfish” in front of the children, who respond, “That’s not a fish, it’s a cnidarian medusa.” Any respect for Mom and Dad is forever stained. Don’t be those parents. Arm yourself with the following. Medusae Your classic “jellyfish” […]