The large sign over the archway said: “Welcome to Pillowburg Resort and Spa!” The small sign next to it said: “No Crabs Allowed.” The guard, a flabby sea slug, noticed me and said, “Oi! We don’t allow your kind. Beat it.” I was like, “Why? What did I do?” The guard said, “You are a […]
Crabs
Posted inLife + Outdoors
Gimme an Anemone
One drawback of beachcombing is the lack of cheerleaders. So, I assembled my own crew of former NFL and CFL cheerleaders who had been fired for various deviant behaviors. I said, “Welcome. Here are your pompoms. They are designed to look like the giant green sea anemone, Anthopleura xanthogrammica.” The cheerleaders waved their bright green […]
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Crabs Sweep Midweek Series Before Hitting the Road
The Humboldt Crabs have kept their early momentum rolling into the week, starting things off with a two-game set against the Redding Tigers. The Tigers proved to be capable opponents for the hometown crustaceans and proved it through the opening stages of Tuesday night’s game when their starting pitcher Will Tasista went five innings giving […]
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The 25 Days of Crustmas
There’s big excitement in the online crustacean nerd community. Alison Young, co-director of the California Academy of Sciences’ Citizen Science Program and Humboldt State alumnus, just invented the Twitter hashtag game #25DaysofCrustmas. The rules of the game are simple. Fellow nerds post a crustacean picture and/or interesting crustacean fact each day of December up to […]
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King Crabs
The Crabs welcomed the West Coast Kings to Humboldt County for the first time with a series sweep. Ten more games left in the season and we’re sitting pretty at 26-13, riding a nine-game win streak. Friday night’s game was one of the more competitive and exciting games of the year. The Kings looked razor […]
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Win One for the Gipper
“Oh, what a beautiful morning! Oh, what a beautiful day! I’ve got a beautiful feeling, everything’s going my way.” My Grandmother used to sing that every morning to wake up my brother and I. And I, not being a morning person, hate hate hated it. Nothing worse than being rousted by someone an hour and […]
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Crabs Win Streak Comes To A Close
Any time the Pacific Union Financial Capitalists (generally called the Puf Caps, which always makes me think of Kirby, the video game character) we’re bound to see some good baseball. Funded by a Texas businessman, the Caps are a nationwide team of plucky youngsters all on their way to Division I programs on scholarship in […]
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Any Port in a Storm? Not in Humboldt
Well, folks, it was a wild weekday series against the San Leandro Ports; but before I get started, I want to discuss something a bit more serious. On Wednesday, someone stole two beers from the Crab Grass Band. I’m having some difficulty accurately describing how wrong this is without using a slough of profanities. At […]
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Crabs Eat Gumbo from Walnut Creek
If any time during the Crabs short 49-game season can be called the Dog Days, it is now. On the heels of Independence Day, with Oyster Fest and Father’s Day far off in the rear-view mirror, Crabs players and fans alike need to dig deep and show their mettle. This past series against the Walnut […]
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Crabs Crunch Expos
Over choruses of “O Canada” and riotous, bench-pouding cheers, the Crabs completed a sweep of the California Expos (née Montreal) Sunday afternoon. In the 10th inning, third baseman Wesley Ghan-Gibson punched a walk-off double over the Expos center fielder and sent the Expos on a quiet bus ride back to Central California (a cruel fate, […]
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Crabs Bomb Three Homers in Series Against B-52s
Attention 101-South drivers: The Crabs have corked their bats and the Samoa exit is no longer safe during game time. Back home from their longest and final road trip of the year, our favorite arthropods pummeled their south bay brethren, the B-52s, in a two-game series. The Battle of the Safety Corridor commenced Tuesday evening, […]
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Crabs Cap off Superlative Week with Massive Shutout
Since a crushing shutout on June 3 against the Corvallis Knights, the Crabs have scored 60 runs and ripped off five consecutive wins. On the heels of pouring a 15-run deluge on and eking out a 4-3 victory in the 12th Friday night, inning against the San Francisco Seals, the Crabbies welcomed the Valley Bears […]