The Right Time to Come Forward with Your Sexual Assault

(October 4, 2018) So you've been on the receiving end of unwanted sexual contact — what the U.S. Bureau of Justice defines as sexual assault. The Centers for Disease Control estimates you're...

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Facebook Update

(June 7, 2018) Hello. Mark Zuckerberg here with a few announcements about our Facebook community. Call me Mark, though. Many humans call me Mark. Just kidding. About the humans. It's been a...

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The Cat Would Like to Open a Dialogue

(May 31, 2018) Let me start by saying I am here to listen and this is a safe space. I want you to know that and feel comfortable. Maybe you could start by...

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Realistic Sex Robots to Save Us All

A word from your friends at HotBotix Engineering

(May 17, 2018) The Southern Poverty Law Center has categorized "incels," involuntarily celibate men who share and promote a virulently misogynist and violent ideology, as a male supremacist hate group. Self-proclaimed members of...

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Breakup Letter from President McKinley's Statue

(April 12, 2018) Dear Arcata, I didn't want to do this by letter but I know if I try to get this all out in person, I'll freeze up. We've had a good...

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Good Guy with a Howitzer

A proposal for private tank ownership

(March 22, 2018) Dear President Trump: I have been retired for more than 15 years and I need a hobby. I thought about trout fishing or bird watching, but they are too benign....

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New Cannabis Strains for Today's Stress

(March 15, 2018) Jefferson Beauregard Express. With a mellow cornbread, Brill Cream and Klansman hood scent, this Indica offspring of Reefer Madness and Jim Crow rolls up on you like a black SUV...

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Book Club Emergency Meeting

To address whether Todd is maybe a racist

(February 15, 2018) Everybody comfortable? Anyone need a cushion or a refill? OK. I've called this book club meeting tonight to discuss some tension that's arisen since we embarked on this new...

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I Sent an Email with a Period Instead of an Exclamation Mark and Everyone Died

(December 14, 2017) This happened at my former employer and only now, years later, do I feel like I can speak about it. I'm not making excuses and I still take full responsibility...

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A Men's Guide to Surviving a Sexual Harassment Witch Hunt

(November 9, 2017) It was a surprise when the tidal wave of sexual harassment and assault allegations against Harvey Weinstein, Bill O'Reilly, James Toback, Mark Halperin, Donald Trump, Roger Ailes, John Besh, Kevin...

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