Jan Carr1 
Member since Sep 21, 2010


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Re: “God's Lamentation

Dear Posters, I'm not certain how Ryan Burns contacted me is of any significance, but I can clear up your mystery. Yes, I believe Ryan saw something I had written and was able to send me a message via Facebook. I wouldn't even know where to start to put your minds at ease and help you to understand this very complex story. I have very few answers, and still have so many questions. I can tell you that my heart is broken. My dear friend is gone. We had a unique relationship over the years. I also have seven adopted children. Although, Nancy and I didn't socalize much, we always came together to support each other when we needed a friend the most. Yesterday, was one of those days for me. I needed her wisdom, her experience and her encouragement and she wasn't here. My pain is so deep, I can only imagine how terribly devastated her children are and how much they miss their mom. I will you that Nancy was one in a million. Her warmth was extreme and comforting. I can still see the twinkle in her eyes when she chuckled. There wasn't a day that I spoke to Nancy that she wasn't hopeful. Even through her frustration and distress, when I spoke to her, she was determined to find truth. I certainly did not agree to tell my story to be a hero. It doesn't matter to me what any of you think about what I did or didn't do. I'm not a professional, just a mom and a friend. I was there to listen when Nancy needed me. I did not give her much advice, other than to encourage her to talk with her counselors. I also encouraged her to talk to social services, which we both did. I waited until the arrest to tell my story publicly. I knew that the facts would be uncovered through the media, as the judicial process began. Although, the system is unpredictable, I have complete faith in the detectives on this case. In the months ahead, as this complex case unravels, we will all have answers that will help us make some sense of this tradgedy. Would I change anything looking back? Yes, I would have contacted Nancy in the last few days of her life. I'm not sure that I could have changed the outcome, but I would have done my darndest. I am so sorry if the NCJ article upset any members of Nancy's family. The members I have communicated with, understand that I shared my story to let this community know that my friend was not crazy. Nancy had a mission, to find truth. Thank goodness her daughter came forward. I would like to thank her for being so brave. Yes, she is the hero! I expect that the posters will now tear apart this letter. I'm not writing this to convince anyone of anything. I would hope that instead of bickering, we reach out to our friends and to our children, hold them close, love and listen. Sincerely, Jan Carr

Posted by Jan Carr on 09/21/2010 at 4:49 AM

Re: “God's Lamentation

Dear Think About It, For the record: I contacted Social Services when I had concerns for the Cardelli children in the home. Like many others, I was not certain there was a sexual relationship until the arrest. Jan Carr

Posted by Jan Carr on 09/19/2010 at 11:08 AM

Re: “God's Lamentation

Dear Kamara, This is the first time I have posted to the NCJ. Please let me clear up the confusion. I was contacted by the NCJ to tell my side of this story. When asked, I told reporter Ryan Burns that I did not see the letter Nancy left and was only told of it's contents by Nancy's daughter. You can certainly confirm this with Mr. Burns. I do know "Child Welfare Advocate." I had nothing to do with her post. Anyone who knew Nancy loved her. She would ask that we set aside our personal opinions and hateful words and work toward a safer community for our children. Thank you, Jan Carr

Posted by Jan Carr on 09/17/2010 at 11:31 PM

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