2009 Make Your Wedding Personal | Show Me Your Cake | Sondra Kirtley: One Crafty Lady
2007 Feed The Hungry Hordes | Operation Romance | Story Of Three Weddings
2006 Party Girl: Meredith Biasca | Wedding Bands | With This Bling…
1998 Capturing The Day On Film | Planning Food For A Crowd | Ah, Sweet Wedded Bliss
These stories were featured in the 2009 edition of the Wedding Guide
How to make your wedding personal
Redwood ‘cookies,’ pink roses, tiki torches
By Judy Hodgson
The bride’s name was Stormy — she’s Yurok and Karuk. And the groom was Robert, Yurok, Karuk and Hupa. They wanted a Native American wedding. I loved that one!”
Guia (pronounced GEE-ah) Heigert was sitting on the porch of the beautiful Lost Whale Inn in Trinidad on a cold and sunny day in January, reminiscing. She and her husband Gary, a retired firefighter, had bought the Inn about five years ago, fulfilling his lifelong dream of becoming an innkeeper. Soon thereafter they began staging small, intimate — and sometimes very unusual — weddings.
Does all that activity bother the other guests at their cozy bed and breakfast? Not at all, since the bridal party is required to rent all six rooms for the weekend.
“Stormy and I had several planning sessions where we’d just sit and talk,” Guia recalled. “She wanted a mix of traditional with some twists of contemporary, but mostly traditional.”
The night before the event — two in the morning, actually — Guia heard activity in the Inn’s kitchen and went to investigate. It turned out the bride and her attendants were still up making shell necklaces to be presented to the elders at the ceremony.
According to tradition, a groom presents gifts, such as regalia or a canoe to “buy” his wife. The necklaces show respect to the elders.
As they arrived the next day, guests walked through the garden gate and dipped their fingers in a bowl of angelica root water. “It’s supposed to free you of all bad feelings, like a cleansing,” Guia explained.
The six bridesmaids wore brown chiffon dresses and “walked on the earth” barefoot across the lawn with the ocean in the background. Three tiny flower girls, wearing multiple necklaces rather than tops, carried baskets of pepperwood leaves instead of flower petals. A nearby charcoal brazier wafted sacred smoke as the elders were presented with their new necklaces.
Guia, who has a background in event planning and still works as a fundraising consultant, says her favorite part of staging weddings is to help a couple realize their own personal dream.
“Weddings are a wonderful blending of families,” she said.
The first wedding they did was not even legal, she recalled. Two young women from Sacramento, with all their brothers and sisters as attendants, took their vows as the ocean roared below.
“All the parents and grandparents were there. Everyone was so joyful and supportive.”
The second wedding was planned around the ethnic heritage of the groom’s mother. She was Samoan, so they wanted a pit-roasted pig and a traditional noodle and vegetable dish.
“We can cook virtually anything,” Guia said. Both she and Gary are excellent cooks, trained by Gary’s late sister, who was a five-star executive chef. But Guia discovered there were health rules against buried pigs, so they hauled a giant barbecue from Ace Rentals in McKinleyville. To get the whole pig back to the inn from Redwood Meats, they had to put the top down on their car. Even more traditional than plain pig, they stuffed the cavity with whole chickens, Samoan-style.
The wedding went off without a hitch. The father wore a lava-lava and a fire dance was performed as well as the hula. Guia had fire orange tulips flown in and tiki torches blazed everywhere.
Then there was the vegan wedding.
“We actually grew the pumpkins on site,” she recalled. “We grow many of our own vegetables, so we served pumpkin soup with toasted seeds using a vegetable broth. We had udon noodles with scallion-ginger-soy sauce. And we made a vegetarian lasagna with portabello mushrooms and our own spinach.” The lasagna was such a hit it now appears on the regular menu for guests at the inn.
Jewish weddings? Of course! Even one in the pouring rain in mid-January.
Guia and Gary rented tents and outdoor heaters, and covered the deck. The menu included fresh, homemade challah and Rock Cornish hens beautifully presented on giant skewers. The attendants held the huppah as the rabbi began. At the end of the ceremony, the groom stomped on the glass and everyone cheered. Then the couple retreated to their room upstairs to consummate the union.
“Well, it’s symbolic,” laughed Guia. After five minutes the rabbi went up to retrieve the couple and declared the deed was done. The reception began and yes, the bride and groom were hoisted up on chairs later during the dancing.
Once Guia planned a Syrian wedding where women guests were presented with special scarves with little bells. After the ceremony, the couple was “danced” in to their head table accompanied by the fluttering, tinkling scarves. Then everyone noshed on fresh hummus and grapes leaves to begin the feast.
There are also “theme” weddings. One couple fell in love to the movie, The Great Gatsby.
“So I rented the video and studied it for ideas. Daisy loved pink roses. We do all the flowers and decorations, too, so I filled the place – everywhere – with pink roses.” The tables were sprinkled with “diamonds” and each held a small silver bell to call the waitstaff. The bride wore an elegant 1920s dress and the men tuxedos.
Guia also told the story of a typical “Humboldt Wedding” she arranged for two people in the logging industry. “It was very sweet, really, but much more traditional.”
Party favors were redwood seedlings and the menu lemon-herb chicken, barbecue ribs, Gary’s beans and corn on the cob.
“I like to personalize the guestbook, too,” Guia said, so she wanted the guests to “sign” a redwood log then have the couple saw off a “cookie” to save for posterity.
It didn’t quite work out as planned, but it was fun trying.
Sondra Kirtley: One Crafty Lady
By Judy Hodgson
You’re going to another wedding and they’ll be throwing rice. Oh, that’s right. You’re not supposed to throw rice because birds will eat it, and their little bellies will swell and explode.
No, actually, according to a quick fact check on the internet, it’s an urban myth. Birds like rice and they already eat several varieties growing in the wild.
Or … forget the rice altogether. Make your wedding memorable and personal in any number of ways, starting with the invites. Better yet, start with a refrigerator magnet that looks like a big strip of film. Ordered up to a year in advance, these magnets show photos of the wedding couple, date of wedding and, in big letters, “Save the date!” Send them to your guests near and far and they will be reminded of the upcoming event every time they reach for a a glass of milk.
“More and more people are being really budget-conscious, so they are already doing a lot of stuff for themselves,” said Sondra Kirtley, owner of Scrapper’s Edge in Eureka. “Of course we have people come in who just want to order invitations straight from the book.” But once they get inside, they start to find — endless possibilities.
Kirtley is a “crafter,” which started as a hobby, became an obsession and then finally a business.
Her interest started years ago after she took a trip to Europe with her mom. She came home with tons of photos and she started staying up late at night, sometimes until 2 in the morning, sorting and arranging the pictures and memorabilia. The result took forever, but she finally ended up with two fat memory books – and she was hooked.
“Paper crafting can be anything related to paper — scrapbooking, working with rubber stamps, making altered books,” which she explained was the practice of taking old, discarded books and turning them into something else entirely.
“It’s about compiling in a crafty and artistic way,” said Sondra, who many locals will remember from the days when she, her brother and mother owned the Fortuna Western Auto store.
What trends does she see these days for do-it-yourselfers?
“Using recycled papers. It’s really big. They’re beautiful.” And while traditional pastel colors are still widely available, couples are often choosing wild and bold.
How are these papers used for weddings? To create many things, like wrapping the throwaway cameras so they match everything on the dinner tables and decorations. And handmade invitations using ribbons, brads, translucent papers and photos. And name-place holders for the tables. And decorative centerpiece collages.
CDs are also popular wedding party favors. Couples send them out after a wedding as a thank you with reception photos. Or, even more popular, CDs are made of pre-recorded reception music and guests take them home to remind them of the special day. And, of course, the CD jackets can be elaborately decorated by a really clever paper crafter.
Another trend is to have a large matted photo of the wedding couple instead of a plain guest book. Guests sign in on the matte frame for posterity.
Sondra advises couples to visit local crafts stores, printers and copy shops for ideas. Sometimes just flipping through a book of invites will spark ideas.
“You can also find so much stuff on-line, but then work with a local store or print shop to do something similar for less money,” she said.
Show me your cake
By Judy Hodgson
Once upon a time, wedding cakes were white, inside and out. Even the carefully sculpted rosettes and garlands made from crusty white sugar and shortening were all white. Just look at any newlyweds’ cake-cutting photo from the 1950s.
Those days are gone.
We asked a few local cake bakers (with the help of Humboldt County’s talented photographers) to show us their cakes and talk about trends.
“Well, finances are an issue these days so we are seeing smaller, decorated three-tiered cakes for cutting and half-sheet cakes on the side to serve a big crowd,” said Bobbie Fritz, cake consultant for Ramone’s Bakery on Harrison in Eureka.
One request that was popular last year was cupcakes. They are often stacked on platforms to resemble a multi-tiered wedding cake. On the positive side, they are ready-to-serve and eliminate the gooey cake-cutting operation, But Bobbie said they are actually more expensive because each cupcake needs to be individually decorated.
And the frosting? Rolled fondant is very popular for its smooth porcelain finish. It also is terrific for holding bright colors and for durability — the cake can sit for hours without melting,
“But buttercream frosting is still No. 1 at Ramone’s. It just tastes great,” said Bobbie.
Individual cake layers on tall pillars were all the rage a few years back, and so were “satellite” cakes on elaborate — and sometimes tipsy — stands. Today the trend is layers stacked right on top of each other.
“Square cakes, tiers stacked, not separated by pillars,” said Stephanie Baldwin, an independent cake baker from Fortuna. “Fresh flowers are still a popular option, replacing the traditional bride-and-groom cake topper. Oh, I do a lot of white and dark chocolate ribbons, too.”
Layers of various types of cakes — one layer of dark chocolate with raspberry filling, another of lemon with fresh lemon curd, and even carrot cake — are still popular for offering guests a choice.
Joan King, the cake decorator and co-owner of Cherry Blossom Bakery, said she is getting more requests for “simplicity and elegance.”
“Smooth sided layers with dramatic ribbons or simple dots are big,” said Joan. “And, yes, square layered cakes.”
Brides often come into a cake consultation with clippings from bridal magazines or a theme already in mind. If not, bakers and bakeries have albums of cakes to look through for ideas on how to personalize the wedding cake. What was one of the most unusual requests Joan received for a wedding?
“I did a Goth wedding once,” she said. “It was black and yes, it had skulls.”She said she prefers couples getting married on or near the seashore that ask for an ocean theme.
“Those are fun. I do a lot of sea shells.”
These stories were featured in the 2008 edition of the Wedding Guide
Counseling before marriage?
By Shane Mizer
So, what’s all the fuss? All of the decision-making the two of you will be doing in the days ahead will most likely consist of things like: Where are we going to get married? What music do we want? What type of food should we serve our guests?
Weeks and months may be devoted to such questions in preparing for your wedding day. However, it may turn out that some of the most important questions the two of you face long term could be overlooked entirely. Namely — after the rings are exchanged, wedding presents opened, photos framed and positioned on the walls — what type of marriage will the two of you have?
Many couples picking up this wedding guide will be at various stages of planning. While it’s no doubt true love and you know you’re ready to make this commitment, marriage and family therapists agreed that the chances of improving the likelihood of a marriage’s success can only be increased by seeking out a premarital counselor.
In Humboldt County, there are many counselors ready to help couples learn more about their relationship and how to get their marriage off to the right start. The North Coast Association of Mental Health Providers has a local web directory of therapists at www.ncamhp.org. where you can research the individual qualifications, backgrounds and areas of specialty. In the meantime, we sat down with three local counselors — Joan Hirschfeld, Hazel Juell and Stuart Altschuler for a round of basic questions.
Why see a premarital therapist?
Joan Hirschfeld: Hmm… Okay, we need counseling when we’re planning our wedding because everything seems to be going really well. (Laughs.) In our day and age, the perception seems to be that psychotherapy and counseling services are for problems rather than my approach, which is, “Let’s be a little preventative here.”
Hazel Juell: A lot of people getting married in the world don’t have any idea what it is about anymore than I would know about going to work in a corporate office. I’d have a learning curve. So, I think when you go for premarital counseling, it’s a good shot that you’re going to learn something.
Stuart Altschuler: A lot of times premarital counseling is not to evaluate whether a couple is really ready to get married, but that they want their relationship to step up to the next level. They want to learn the skills to do this, and then make the move forward with the wedding.
Why do people get married anyway?
JH: I don’t know. The answer is as specific as the couple. It might be a religious or spiritual need. When I’ve worked with couples that are splitting up and I’ll ask them how they negotiated this relationship they were going into, very few of them approached their joint lives together with that kind of intentionality.
HJ: They fall in love. And when you fall in love, you have a hormonal quality, a body hormone. … That’s over in six months or two years or whatever. It’s over and you’re like, okay who are we? It’s kind of like coming down from a couple of Manhattans.
SA: For the most part, I’d say people in our society and culture get married because they’ve fallen in love and they’re really celebrating that love.
What’s the purpose of marriage?
JH: Well, there’s a deep history of social contracts — formal and informal. And in our day and age, the marriage contract has evolved beyond what I’d suspect is its original purpose. As a social contract, it helped keep the community tied together. Today, in our society, especially, it’s extremely personal.
HJ: It seems to be primal in the set-up of the species. There’s this tremendous draw between a man and a woman. I think the male sex drive, depending on the guy, of course, is a strong motivator and it gets things done. And the woman’s female part is to hold and to have, to nurture, to decorate and to put up the curtains — that makes the nest for it. It makes his have meaning and it makes hers have meaning.
SA: The purpose of marriage really has more to do with the legal aspects of a relationship, which is why there is such a struggle over same sex marriage. I’m totally in support of marriage rights and equal rights. If it’s heterosexual, you have the legal rights of inheritance and the issues of children, and decision-making for one another — all these things.
The best reasons to get married?
JH: As we go through life those change, inevitably. Our circumstances, our context, our condition — everything changes.
HJ: Because you want to, I guess. There’s safety and security in the bottom line sense. Then, there’s the extended family thing. It’s really good to be related to people. If you marry someone whose family you admire, you actually accrue a family. The native populations do this all the time. You join that group and now you’ve got a tribe. I think it’s a natural thing to want a tribe.
SA: There are the legal protections it gives to a couple and any children they may have, companionship, and a sense of connection, financial security and social acceptance. Any or all of these things may be important to you. But to me, the best reason is love.
Why do couples get it wrong?
JH: That’s another thing premarital counseling offers. It’s not to point out what’s wrong but just as a check-in. In all that good feeling, how come? What is it that informs that? And it really makes sure it’s kept as far in the front of their lives as the wedding currently is.
HJ:It seems there are a lot of problems marrying someone from a different level of society or cultural expectations or financial expectations. Now, because we all go to college and we meet people of all different backgrounds, geographical locations and ideas, we come together and now we’re going to just enjoy each other’s family and feel comfortable? Good luck!
SA: I think a lot of it has to do with communication issues. A lot of it has to do with people going into the relationship for the wrong reasons — low self-esteem, the need to be wanted, or the need to fit in publicly.
Last words of advice?
JH: Intentionality. Have a conversation about what the wedding means. Not just in terms of how many guests are we going to have and how are we going to feed them. It goes back to your question, why are we doing this? Just have the conversation and don’t wait until it’s, “I think we need therapy because we’re really in trouble.”
HJ: Be intentional. Know what you’re trying to do and study it. Build your life.
SA: You know that phrase, “To thine own self be true?” Know yourself. Be honest with yourself as to why you’re taking this step, and make sure that you really believe and feel that there’s good communication between the two of you. Get honest with how much is motivating you based on pressure of society or family, and if that’s your main motivation, you need to slow down and back off a little bit.
A few questions to ask yourself:
1. Is there equal fervor between the two of you for marriage?
2. Are your parents keen on your wedding plans?
3. Is it really love?
4. Will the two of you be able to pay the bills?
5. Is this the person you want to be with for the rest of your life?
6.Do you know how to take care of a home?
7. What happens when you don’t get your way?
8. Do you know how to ask for help?
9. Do you plan to seek premarital counseling?
Joan Hirschfeld, MA, MFT, has been practicing for 10 years in Arcata. Hazel Juell, EdD, MFT, has been practicing for 30 years in Eureka. Stuart Altschuler, MA, MFT, of Ferndale, has been practicing for 34 years.
When you hire a pro
By Elizabeth Hinckley Ford
Congratulations! Whether you’re newly engaged or just weeks away from your big day, it is an exhilarating time. Having recently walked down the aisle myself, I have a helpful tip that can make your day everything you want it to be and maybe even better:
Consider hiring a wedding planner.
My husband and I both grew up in Humboldt County so when we decided to get married we knew the guest list would be long. The size of our wedding still amazes me — close to 700 attendees — and we could never have pulled it off without the help of pros.
We hired two local companies, Two Moms Party Planning and Weddings by Design. From day one Nancy Foster of Two Moms kicked us into high gear. She immediately got to work reserving the extra 300 chairs I had forgotten, the three pagoda tents I had been indecisive about, and arranging a pie-tasting night for me to try pies from eight different sources. Nancy made difficult phone calls I was avoiding, and assured me that from set-up to clean-up my only job was to relax and have fun.
I also was fortunate to be able to have Shirley Atkins of Weddings by Design to coordinate our ceremony itself. In addition to saving us money on tuxedos and bridesmaid dresses, her buying service saved us a small fortune on the 2,500 yards of double-faced satin ribbon in the impossible-to-find shades of magenta, tangerine and orange I had chosen.
With all the pressure of having a perfect day, weddings are undoubtedly stressful. Wedding planners allowed me to not stress over the details. I knew that Nancy was going to stay all day or all night until the decorations were right so I didn’t have to. And I knew that Shirley would keep us on schedule so we could make the most of our time at our location.
One of our biggest requests of Nancy was that we didn’t want any of our friends or family setting up and taking down the 80 tables and 650 chairs. Nancy organized a crew that did it for us while we got to relax. She negotiated an early set-up with the equipment rental company, and followed through with ensuring we got our deposits back.
My mother and I grew our own magenta dahlias to add to bouquets at the wedding. When we realized we didn’t have nearly enough flowers and no back-up plan, Nancy had her staff whip up super-sized bouquets of dahlias my mom was able to get at last minute from a local supplier.
Wedding planners not only make sure every detail is addressed but if ever a problem arises, they are the trouble shooters. You can relax and know that they are going to take care of it, sometimes without you even knowing. My husband had a specific request for the reception: for the bar to have a special case of Budweiser for a co-worker of his. When Nancy found out the bartender forgot, she sent one of her own staff to get a case from the store and hand delivered it.
I was actually pretty calm that day when Shirley finally walked into the room where I was waiting with my bridesmaids and said, “It’s time.” Her presence alone kept me focusing on what was really most important: I was getting married.
Shirley’s experience guided us through our day, fitting everything into our perfect afternoon. The band was cued to play at her signal when we reached the end of the aisle after our “I do’s.” Our guests never had to wait for the food to be served. Shirley choreographed the reception to flow effortlessly from the first dance to our exit in Merrill’s vintage Dodge Power Wagon.
Nancy had mastered the decorations. Each of the 18 colored lanterns per tent flowed gently in the breeze, just as I had imagined, and little girls played with our satin ribbon table toppers as if they were little ballerinas.
After perfect weather all day the fog started to roll in just as we were driving off the ranch to our after party. The day was perfect.
On the morning after the wedding my husband and I were recalling our favorite parts about the day and our unanimous opinion was that the day was flawless and we owed it not only to our parents, but to our wedding planners.
The magic of a gown
By Karen Sack
What makes a woman a vision of beauty on her wedding day? You know, the moment the guests first turn to look, her parents’ eyes tear up, and the groom gets that slightly stunned look on his face? Is it the hairstyle and makeup, that inner glow of happiness? Sure, but most likely it’s the shock of seeing her standing there in that wedding dress.
How can a minimum of four yards of fabric so dramatically alter a bride’s appearance? Because fabric can play into our senses; it is easy to be captivated by the rustle and poof of silk, the way satin drapes and moves, hugging the body.
Ready-made gowns can be found locally at specialty shops and department stores, and wedding consultants have books to special order from. And then there are those brides who choose another route: custom, handmade.
If you’re curious about organza, tulle, Shantung, satin taffeta and chiffon, JoAnn Fabrics in Eureka may be a place to start. Pattern books in the store generally feature a few pages devoted to wedding gowns which savvy and particular seamstresses mix and match to create one-of-a-kind looks for the bride-to-be.
Be prepared to be dazzled at Fabric Temptations off the Plaza in Arcata. Dressmakers will delight in white silk dupioni, silk satin peau de soie or a variety of delicate brocades of silk and rayon and dainty Swiss cotton netting. “Past Patterns” provides authentic reproductions of old-style wedding gowns, whereas “Folkwear Patterns” are inspired by old styles and offer corsets and Edwardian wedding gowns with easy instructions. The serious seamstress can also get bridal boning (rigid plastic which supports the bodice) and a wide variety of notions including clasps and buttons in all shapes and sizes from antler to mother of pearl.Finally, Fabric Temptations has skeins of lace weight yarns of alpaca, cashmere, mohair or even tofu — yes, it’s from soy — which are available if a knitted or crocheted bodice is desired.
If you have a dream but limited sewing skills, there’s Jennifer Harris, owner of Hempsown. Jennifer has been sewing for 15 years and specializes in custom gowns. She recommends a bride contact her as early as possible to make a consultation appointment and lay out a time line and design choices. Custom gowns start at $600 and she has received deposits more than six months in advance of a wedding day.
Depending on the difficulty of the design, Jennifer usually sets aside two weeks for each bride. She encourages them to have their finished dresses hanging in their closet at least one month before the wedding. (Due to advance commitments, rush orders are rarely accepted.) Jennifer enjoys creating designs based on her clients’ input and prefers to use natural sustainable fabrics including hemp and hemp blends, 100 percent silk choices such as Dupioni and Chiffon and organic cotton lace. Jennifer enjoys doting on her clients and says that many blend several styles together from magazine photos. “A lot of brides ask for the corset style that laces up the back,” she says. “It is really fun to turn their scrap paper ideas into a one-of-a-kind, form-fitting gown. It is a very satisfying challenge to make them all happy.”This year Jennifer will offer a sample handmade, ready-to-wear collection in the store which can be altered as needed.
One local store, Amerind Bay, offers dramatically unique wedding gowns where one can find vintage romantic dresses inspired by the ’20s and ’30s starting from around $400. The store’s clientele tends to buy the Hollywood Glamour look — handmade figure-hugging dresses with intricate bead and sash detailing and embroidery, sometimes accompanied by delicate jackets. And, with a nod to traditionalists, big skirted gowns are also in stock.
Promises, formerly Diana’s, in Henderson Center is the only store dedicated exclusively to brides and bridal parties. Linda Alexander, the new owner, and Lori Alto, the store’s alterations expert, said that they carry all styles and that white is still the No. 1 choice of brides. And the best-selling style? A long, simple, strapless A-line gown in matte satin with train and modest ornamentation on bodice and hemline.There are hundreds of gowns in stock starting at $400.
In Humboldt County, the choices in wedding gowns are many and varied. Perhaps even bamboo, an up-and-coming eco-fabric, will find a home in our local wedding fashion scene soon.
Where do all the flowers go?
By Karen Sack
Flowers are to a wedding like icing is to a cake — essential, beautiful and delicate.Whether the flowers are arranged by professionals or friends, commercially or homegrown, they add elegance to your special day. Flower planning starts as soon as you choose your wedding colors. If you refer to the wedding checklist at the back of this guide, you’ll see a reminder to start thinking of your flowers as early as nine to 12 months before your wedding day.
Cut, potted and rented flowers grace tables and altars these days. Cut flowers in vases are a frequent choice, though outdoor venues and enterprising nursery owners have expanded live plant usage. Now, potted flowers are nestled in amongst existing plants in a garden or placed in groupings on floors as well as tables indoors.Locally, businesses such as Orchids for the People sell and lease live blooms for weddings and other one-day occasions.
A wafting fragrance of the bouquets in rooms is limited only by the space they inhabit and the size of your checkbook. Apart from food, there is nothing more pleasing to the nose than walking into a flower shop where clustered flowers compete for your attention. One example of this was the scent of lilies which greeted me when I walked into the studio of Sarah Abernathy.
Sarah grew up among plants. Fifty years ago her parents opened Sherwood Forest Nursery, which is now owned by her sister Kathy. Sarah has been providing flowers for local weddings for most of 35 years. Although she has not kept track of how many weddings she has supplied with cut flowers, based on the number of weddings worked per year, the number is in the thousands.
Q:What flowers are most commonly used in weddings?
Flower choices have varied throughout the years. Current favorites include roses, freesias, miniature calla lilies and stephanotis (a lovely white five-petal flower from Hawaii). Outside of bridal bouquets, boutonnieres and corsages, other popular flowers used are snapdragons, larkspur, delphinium, lilies, hydrangeas, tulips and dahlias.
Q: Describe the most common uses and general cost of flowers in weddings.
Bridal party uses and costs are: bridal bouquets generally starting around $100, boutonnieres about $7.50 each, bridesmaid’s bouquets $35 each, and if a flower girl is carrying petals and I have them in stock, I generally supply them for free. I tend to discourage brides from wearing flowers in their hair because flowers are often too big and heavy. Corsages start at $12 each and flowers used on cakes generally $50. Decorative displays of flowers in churches, arches and centerpieces are usually a minimum of $35, but they are limited only by a person’s budget.
Q:If someone is on a budget and wants to use homegrown or farmer’s market flowers, what general tips can you offer?
Homegrown flowers are a romantic idea, but, generally don’t work well. They’re not in bloom when needed. Choose durable flowers over exotics or fragile ones at a farmer’s market. For example, tulips are lovely but won’t hold up.Durable choices include alstromeria, calla lilies, daisies and carnations. Talk to the farmers about the longevity and care of their plants. Most flowers respond well to 100 degree water; it helps them absorb the water so they last longer.
Q:Do you supply anything besides flowers to a wedding?
As a florist I use tulle, organza or satin as wraps for arches, bridges, fences, pews and vehicles. Once even a wagon!
Q:Have you noticed any recent trends in the use of cut flowers in weddings?
Personally, I find my clients like simple, elegant arrangements that don’t use many filler flowers.However, the variety and availability of choices, especially among filler flowers has increased dramatically.The use of wildflowers is a new trend for 2008.
Q:What happens to the flowers after the wedding?
Bridesmaids generally keep their own bouquets.I have seen other flowers given to guests as they depart and remaining flowers donated to helpers, cemeteries, hospitals and care homes.
These stories were featured in the 2007 edition of the Wedding Guide
A story of three weddings
By Judy Hodgson
My day job is publisher of the weekly North Coast Journal newspaper and several magazines: a monthly real estate guide called Coast Real Estate, an annual Menu of Menus (a comprehensive guide to Humboldt County’s non-chain restaurants) and this 2007 Wedding Guide you now hold in your hands.
Not that I need another job, but I have also been a wedding planner for more than 20 years. It’s definitely a part-time gig. My husband and I own the Fieldbrook Winery, where we offer a venue for outdoor weddings in the summer.
I’m also a mom, and last October my husband Bob and I married off daughter No. 3. I figure over the years I have helped plan about 200 to 250 weddings — I lost count! — including our own three daughters. I have so many wedding stories I might write a book some day, omitting names of course. But for now, I thought I’d pass on some tips for parents.
First and most important, have a good time. Plan on it! It’s an important celebration, yes, one of the major passages in their lives and yours. But it’s really just a big party to be savored and enjoyed. Don’t sweat anything that may go wrong because certainly something will. Like the time a cake went over. (We were able to salvage enough to feed everyone, and even the bride joined in the laughter.)
Second, it’s not your wedding. It’s theirs. If they want to get married barefoot on a beach cliff in January, say, “That’s a romantic idea, but your grandma’s got a walker so how can we make sure she’s warm and comfortable?” When helping them plan — assuming they actually ask for your help! — listen carefully to what is important to them. (More on this later.)
Third, troubleshoot as you go along. Even though nothing goes exactly as planned, try to head off potential conflicts. I had a bride’s mother pull me aside at the rehearsal and say conspiratorially, “Her father is such a jerk. I want him seated in the back row!” I’ve heard a dozen versions of that comment and I always reply in a very loud voice, “It’s really Jennifer’s wedding, so let’s go ask her together where her father is sitting.” I also announce at the rehearsal to the entire wedding party, “I hope you and all your friends have a really, really good time, but I need your help. No drunks on the road. You’re welcome to leave your car overnight. A cab ride is really cheap!”
Finally, no one should have to hock the farm. Just as every wedding is unique, there are many ways to pay for one these days. Are the bride and groom in their 30s with good-paying jobs? Well, maybe your folks are nearing retirement and shouldn’t be writing big fat checks. Let mom and dad buy the champagne and the photographer and tell them everything else is under control. Is there a big financial discrepancy between two families? Offer what you can and offer it early so the bride and groom can plan. There are several large bills — food and beverages are two — that the groom’s family can offer to pay, taking pressure off the bride’s family or the bridal couple. There is nothing wrong with simplicity for the rehearsal dinner either. Yes, even pizza or grilled hamburgers in someone’s backyard.
The three weddings for our daughters — in 1993, 1997 and 2006 — were very different. For daughter No. 3, we did not have to budget as closely as we did for the first two. But the main reason those three weddings were unique is because the three of them (and their husbands) are so different.
That leads us back to focusing on the wedding couple, what is really important to them, and how you can help them achieve that dream day.
Being in the business, we already had the location. We also are lucky to have a trained cake baker/decorator in the family — daughter No. 2, who made not only her sisters’ cakes when the time came, but her own glorious cheesecakes in 1997. (She worked for Berit Meyer at Ramone’s Bakery when she was in high school and a pastry shop in Portland while in college.)
How about catering? Daughters Nos. 1 and 2, who were active in 4-H when they were young, definitely wanted a genuine pit-roasted pig. That’s no problem in Fieldbrook since we had a pig farm down the street and an experienced crew of neighbor-volunteers. The rest of the meal was not exactly potluck, but I did ask a few very close friends to make one dish on the menu to feed the entire crowd. (I still remember Pat’s curry-rice salad with almonds and dried apricots).
Do I recommend a do-it-yourself wedding feast? Absolutely not, especially if you can afford a good caterer like we did last year. The roasted flesh of choice for daughter No. 3 was her dad’s home-raised lamb and a Middle Eastern spice-rubbed chicken with preserved lemons. This time we didn’t cook a thing. (I have found that church members really know how to feed a crowd well, so there’s another resource to consider.)
Daughter No. 1 really wanted a video of the entire bash along with the photographs. That 14-year-old video is really special. It has become a living slice of family history for us, a time when three of the girls’ grandparents were still alive.
Let’s talk wedding dresses and sentimentality. Daughter No. 1 borrowed — borrowed! — an over-the-top-fancy dress from one of her friends who was four inches taller than she was. I tried to talk her out of it. Our budget wasn’t that small! Besides, I still have my hippy little empire waist dress from 40 years ago even though it’s hideous and no one would ever wear it. No, she said, it’s a waste of money. It’s not that important and why store something for the next 50 years? She looked great. We took the temporary hem back down after the wedding, had it cleaned and boxed, and sent it back with a thank you note. Besides, what she really wanted a really good DJ who was well stocked with new country and old rock ‘n’ roll, lots of shrimp and chocolate-dipped strawberries, and at least two different kegs of specialty beer for all their old college friends. It was quite a summer party for 125 guests.
Daughter No. 2 had a smaller wedding in the middle of winter, so her dad had to stack up all the barrels to make room inside the winery. We draped the barrels in little twinkly white Christmas lights and the flowers were tulips and lilies, the only blooms in bloom. In the pouring rain, the poor guys had trouble lighting the fire in the pig pit outside until someone thought to dump gasoline on it. It was a short and simple ceremony — unrehearsed. We stood around in a half circle. The couple showed up, read a poem to each other and jumped over a broom (an African tradition). Music is a big deal to both of them. A good friend, a musician in Portland, came down to play the piano long into the night until the DJ took over for dancing. (Her dress, by the way, was definitely on the “important” list and I can’t tell you how many shopping trips it took to find just the right one.)
Daughter No. 3 was her own wedding coordinator. We had to do all the planning long distance since she lives in Washington, D.C. I got my to-do list from her via e-mail on a regular basis. She had already secured her own dress — it’s formal! — and everyone else was instructed to wear black so we’d match in the pictures. “Order these flowers in this exact color, mom.” Besides the food, the most important thing for her was the photographer. Since her new Persian-American in-laws were flying in from all over the U.S. and Iran, she wanted everyone to have their own individual family portrait as a gift. It was a wonderful part of the reception, watching everyone pose. (And those photos are stunning! Thank you, Elizabeth.)
At the end of her wedding, the caterer was cleaning up and she said to me, “Gee, you really looked like you were enjoying yourself.”
I certainly did, and I hope you do too!
Operation: Romance in the Redwoods Or How to Have a Wedding in Less Than 72 Hours
By Shane Mizer
The wedding bells are ringing, but instead of the old familiar wedding march— “Here comes the bride…”— it’s the theme song for “Mission Impossible.”
Ben Lamb and Alyssa Holder, a young couple from Bowling Green, Kentucky, traveling through Humboldt County this January, proved that it is possible to plan a wedding from start to finish in less than three days. Few people reading the NCJ’s wedding guide will attempt such a feat, but some of you know, like Ben and Alyssa, that when the feeling is right you have to act on it.
“I looked over at Alyssa one morning, after we’d finished up with my last job in Seattle,” Ben explained, “and said to her, honey, let’s go to California!”
“California” was Ben and Alyssa’s code for “let’s get married,” and sort of an offshoot of their rambling life: Ben and Alyssa have lived in eight different states in the past year because of Ben’s job as a mobile tree service contractor.
The couple announced their engagement in July, and planned a June ceremony the following year in Kentucky among family and friends. But the bride
and groom became restless as those family and friends took the wedding plans into their
own hands.
So, in an effort to reclaim their wedding, Ben and Alyssa did what any other midwestern couple in search of a romantic adventure would have done: They got into their car and drove down the coast from Seattle, an impromptu January wedding on their horizon. For Ben, it was just following an old trail from a childhood memory.
“My father had taken me and the rest of my family (Ben is one of 15) on a trip through the Sinkyone Wilderness when I was 9,” Ben said. “We drove around some pretty amazingly steep grades in this old touring bus. The park ranger couldn’t believe the size of it, and that my father had managed to steer it around all those windy logging roads.”
It was a Wednesday night when Ben and Alyssa arrived in Eureka. By chance, pulling into the parking lot of the Eagle House Victorian Inn, they met manager and marketing special events coordinator Beti Trauth. She possessed all the contacts and networking know-how to pull off just about anything in Humboldt County, including a 72-hour wedding.
“While talking with them, I heard the accent and asked where they were from,” Trauth said. “It was serendipitous. They were from Bowling Green, just a couple of hours from my hometown of Louisville.”
Over a dinner conversation, the couple got on famously with Trauth, an experienced coordinator and professional photographer who embraced the opportunity to help them locate everything they would need to get married.
“We had all sorts of questions,” Alyssa said. “Like, who was going to marry us? Who was going to do the pictures? What about my hair … my dress?”
“Normally, this kind of a thing takes months in the planning,” Trauth said. “Most people book their wedding a year in advance, and to find caterers and vendors willing to drop everything on the spot — well, it’s just absolutely amazing!”
Although a rough plan had been in place to locate a church in the redwoods and an officiant to carry out the ceremony, with Trauth now on board the couple had a little wiggle room in which to customize their wedding. After pointing his finger at a photograph on the cover of a local travel magazine, bearing a stunning view of the Pacific Ocean, Ben was told he had just discovered Trinidad Beach. The site of the wedding was now picked.
The rest of the planning was a result of intense coordination and luck.
Now it was Thursday, and the first thing Alyssa had to do was order the cake — Ben’s 25th birthday cake, actually — which they found to be easy enough after placing a call to Cherry Blossom Bakery. The bakery was able to whip together a birthday cake within 24 hours, as well as solidify arrangements to have a wedding cake made and ready to go for Saturday.
“We didn’t want to have both Ben’s birthday and our wedding anniversary on the same day,” Alyssa said.
It’s hard to imagine the difficulty they would have encountered if they had tried. But fate seemed to be guiding them along.
Next, Trauth recommended a videographer with Circle Sound Productions, Rick St. Charles. As luck would have it, he was free that Saturday. Trauth also knew a non-denominational minister, Betsy Elliot from the Church of Religious Science in Arcata. A phone call was made, and Elliot agreed to be there on Saturday. The wheels were turning and everything was in motion.
When Alyssa contacted Diana’s Bridal Boutique, she was told they could have a dress in a 24-hour period. The measurements taken, the dress ordered (it was the manufacturer’s last one in stock), everything was happening seamlessly.The dress arrived.
Most brides stress out organizing their weddings a year in advance, so you can imagine what Alyssa must have been going through trying to keep track of what still needed to be done on the actual day of the wedding.
“For the life of me, I couldn’t recall where I booked my haircut,” Alyssa confessed.
In a frenzied rush, Alyssa began calling everyone she could. Finally, a woman named Venus (yes, the Goddess of Love) picked up the phone at Eureka Spa and gave her good news. Venus had a last-minute cancellation that Saturday, and could take her in on the spot.
By 3 p.m., a limousine from A Better Choice Limousines arrived at the Eagle House to send the couple and their wedding party — Ben’s two children, 6-year-old Shane and 4-year-old Alexis — to a secluded cove on Trinidad Beach.
Roses became the central theme of the wedding both in décor and ceremony. The bride walked down a path lined with long-stemmed roses stuck in the sand by her groom, and holding a bouquet designed by Eureka Florist.
After 4 p.m., the bride and groom were pronounced husband and wife — but not before the bride’s father gave her away via cell phone.
How to feed the hungry hordes
By Judy Hodgson
Let’s face it. Guests at a wedding expect to be fed.And there is no getting around the fact that catering is one of the biggest expenses of any size wedding.
So what are your options?
The most affordable, of course, is to do it yourself, which requires a lot of planning and prep work, and the energy, patience and good will of your family and closest friends. Put a couple of guys on barbecue duty early in the day. (Did you know that you can cook chicken and even tri-tip and keep it warm and ready for hours in an ordinary ice chest?) Prepare appetizer trays, a green and a hearty salad — like rice, pasta, black bean or old-fashioned potato — the day before. Add fresh rolls, cheese and fruit and you’ve got a great spread. If you choose this route, keep the menu simple and hire help to serve and clean up so you and all your guests can enjoy the day without working behind the scenes.
But this is a wedding, one of the most important family celebrations of a lifetime. Don’t do it yourself unless you really, really love to cook — or you have no other financial option!
The next step up in affordability is a limited menu prepared by some of our great local deli chefs. (Keep in mind that prices are estimates only since the cost of many food items vary. Caterers say beef is especially hard to price this year.)
Mark Johnson, manager of Wildplatter Café at Wildberries Market, suggests large specialty platters that feed up to 25 people each. The antipasto tray, for instance, has proscuitto and other deli meats, great cheeses like gorgonzola or local chevre from Cypress Grove, roasted peppers, artichokes and more for $59.99. He also mentions a large variety of wraps that can be cut to serve more than one person at a party, or a tray of lasagna with salads. The supermarket has an extensive list of grilled options including vegetables. Order ahead and put someone in charge of picking up the feast at the designated time.
Berit Meyer, owner of Ramone’s Bakery and Café, has been serving hungry people coffee and pastries for 26 years. Three years ago she and her husband Brian expanded to catering off site. She suggests a build-your-own sandwich menu for the budget-minded ($6.25 per person, more for tri-tip) with fresh bread baskets, meats, cheeses, veggies and spreads. She also mentions very affordable wraps at $5 each, salads (spinach, Caesar, fruit, rice) or a tray of warm roasted rosemary potatoes as a side dish ($2 per person). Servers are additional and delivery is available.
Chuck Kircher, deli manager at Murphy’s Sunnybrae Market, says his staff can barbecue on site and provide full service including wait staff and rental arrangements. He said his food prices are often lower than many caterers because grocery stores purchase ingredients at wholesale and in bulk.
“A basic complete meal may run $9 to $12 per person,” Kircher said. That includes appetizers, salads, entrees and sides. He also mentions CC Market Deli in Rio Dell as a friendly competitor. CC’s has a special rotisserie in store for meats, then transports everything to the party.
For those who have the budget for the best of Humboldt, there are independent catering companies (all listed in this guide beginning on page 17) and those operated by your favorite local restaurants.
We sat down with one veteran caterer for tips on how to approach the wedding feast. Elizabeth Adams moved to Humboldt County in 1994 from San Diego where she had run a full-service gourmet deli and catering business. She was head of Abruzzi Catering for 10 years and in 2004, along with partner Matt Yardley, purchased Hurricane Kate’s in Eureka.
Q: What do families need to budget to feed their guests?
It depends on the number of people and the menu. We can do sandwiches and salads, deli-style catering for less, but typically full dinners are $20 to $30 per person. We can do a wonderful hors d’oeuvres menu for about $12 per person.
Q: Are there any trends you are noticing in local weddings?
A lot of people want a more traditional menu — we do a lot of barbecue, tri tip and salmon with on-site cooking. But we also have lots of requests for different themes. One recent one was Mexican. It was really nice. Another was a tea wedding with petite sandwiches and hors d’oeuvres, all hand-passed during the reception.
My biggest thing is fresh. People are not going for heavy eating, so light, flavorful and very fresh ingredients.
Q: What is a menu you’ve done recently, for example?
We did a grilled salmon with a tropical salsa. Lemon-dill is also a light and refreshing option. And we paired it with a wild mushroom lasagna.
Q: What should a couple look for in choosing a caterer?
There are three things that are really important: presentation, personal service and the quality of the food. You have to have all three for a successful meal.
Q: What about presentation?
People really want creative, beautiful food presentation, eye appeal. And they want something different. Chefs are usually competitive and like to come up with things that are new instead of just repeating the same menu. It’s important to be creative — and adaptable.
Q: What are some of the challenges you face?
There’s location, whenever you don’t have a lot of space, or … you’re in the middle of the redwoods. You have to make things work for the location. Timing is another thing about weddings. You can’t just say the meal is at this time and hold them to it. What if the ceremony runs late?
Q: And disaster stories, things that went wrong?
Not really. The cake that went over, it wasn’t picture-friendly but no one got upset! We saved enough to serve. Mostly, it’s little behind-the-scenes, small things — things that are fixable. Once the chef forgot the lettuce for the salad. We sent someone back for it while the rests of us started plate-up. We had a barbecue in the redwoods and hamburgers with no ketchup. Luckily, a small store was nearby.
Q: How different are weddings from regular catering jobs?
I take things pretty seriously. It’s their special day. I used to do multiple catering jobs in the same day, but not any more. Now with the restaurant, we only do one (outside) job. I like to be there. I don’t go on vacation if I’ve got a catering job.
Q: Do you have any cranky bride stories?
Just a few, but it’s rare. I really like catering weddings because generally people are in a really good mood. The restaurant business is different. Each table is full of people with expectations and they are paying the bill directly. At a wedding, the guests are generally happy.
Q: What indoor venues do you like to work in?
The Adorni can hold 300-400, but the kitchen is crazy … not cook-friendly. It has a household oven and stovetop! River Lodge (Fortuna) is great with lots of room. The Arcata Community Center is good, and the Wharfinger, it’s really small but at least it has a four-rack oven.
Q: Any words of wisdom for the wedding couple?
Don’t try to take on too many things yourself. Delegate!
These stories were featured in the revamped 2006 North Coast Journal Wedding Guide
Party girl
By Judy Hodgson
Ask Meredith Biasca how many wedding receptions the Party Place is involved with each year and she shakes her head. “Some weekends we have 10, sometimes just one big one. It’s got to be in the hundreds.” That’s a lot of weddings over the past 16 years since she married Russ Biasca , went to work for and eventually took over management of the business from her mother-in-law, Allene. Meredith recalls her first date with her future husband in 1985, Rhododendron weekend. It was also the grand opening for the Party Place, an offshoot of Don’s Rent-All. “All mom-and-pop rental stores have equipment and tools, and usually a small section of candelabras and rollaway beds. Don’s split into three – the Party Place and Broadway Medical. It was time. I don’t think customers appreciated men in greasy coveralls coming out to wait on them for a party.” Because of her years in the wedding business, we sat down with her to talk about planning that big day.
Q: Where do people like to get married?
Everyone wants to get married out in the woods – some remote location. That’s the big thing here in Humboldt. But they don’t always think, where do you plug in the punch fountain? Where’s the water to wash things?
Q: The most remote location you’ve done?
Snow Camp. That was our longest haul. We bought an enclosed trailer for that one. We hauled everything we owned at the time – dishes, chairs. It took three vehicles, all of our people and the guys from Don’s. I went up, too, because they forgot poles. It was gorgeous, but what a drive. As I’m going in I thought, how did they get the semi up? It was a narrow, dirt road with trees. We didn’t realize and we packed the white chairs in a stakeside truck and they were filthy. It was fun.
Q: What other locations requests do you get?
We get a lot for weddings on the beach. It’s kind of hard to set up an arch since there’s nothing to anchor to – just sand. We put up a tent once down on the coast in a torrential downpour. I have to remind people a tent is a canvas top on a pole structure. It’s not a building. Sides don’t help with the rain comes in sideways. And there was all this electrical equipment …
Q: What equipment do you haul for these rural weddings?
Everything. Tents, tables, chairs, dishes, silverware, linen, glassware, arches. Candelabras are my favorite – outside! The wind blows. Now at least we have some with glass that hold little tea lights.
Q: Do you have unusual requests?
Well, we stock some things in gold and they want silver. It’s popular. Now we have more things in silver.
Q: What was the biggest wedding you’ve done?
When I first started, one of the Ford family [ranching] got married. They had 600. We had to subrent things from Sacramento. Rental companies are pretty good about that. We weren’t big enough.
Q: Do you do weddings with unusual themes?
Well, there’s Halloween, all guests come in costumes. Renaissance weddings are pretty popular. And the summer solstice – or the winter – where we do the wedding on whatever day that is. Those two days are big.
Q: What about wedding consultants?
First, everybody thinks they are a bridal consultant. You do one wedding, you help your cousin, and you’re a bridal consultant. We do have a number of good ones now, however. Fifteen years ago, there were none. What we do here is what we’ve always done; we consult. We’re really not planners.
Q: Did you ever want to be a wedding planner?
Heck no. I also never want to go into catering. It’s tough. People don’t RSVP. You have to guess. We have caterers around who are really good cooks and everything looks beautiful. They usually prepare extra. I have the utmost respect for them.
Q: How far ahead do people plan?
We get people who come in and say, we’re planning a wedding – for this weekend. But often it’s up to a year ahead. We are sold out of equipment several weekends in July already. We also get people now for 2007.
Q: The most popular months?
July and August. September and October are also good for outdoor weddings. Not April. Not June.
Q: What trends have you noticed?
Cake tops. We used to do a tremendous business in cake tops. A lady came up here twice a year in her motor home full of cake tops. I don’t know if people are going on-line to buy them or they’re using flowers. That’s really popular. Table runners are big — certain colors and textures for their linens. Some people are very particular and money doesn’t matter. Karaoke machines.
Q: What’s the most over-the-top, expensive wedding you’ve worked on?
At the Masonic Hall some years ago. It was supposed to be for 400-500, but not that many showed up. We provided what we had – candelabras, serving dishes – but they wanted a particular kind of dish and we only have one. So we hooked them up with a company in bay area that carries 12-15 kinds of dishes. They pretty much hired every caterer in this area for that one. They rented the Masonic Temple for a week before and had electricians come in and run wiring up and draped the ceiling with cloth to diffuse the light so it wouldn’t look like such a barn. They had a floral designer and she hired a bunch of florists here. They had four separate food lines – with different food in each. They had bottles of wine with etched glass for party favors.
Q: But that’s hardly typical.
This is Humboldt County. You can get married for the cost of the license and go to the courthouse. Or you can spend $100,000. In other areas, $100,000 is cheap.
Q: And what about disasters?
Well, cakes go over. We had a company screw up someone’s invitations. … My father-in-law used to make our wooden arches. One time early on I had to do a delivery and no one told me that each arch top was numbered. So I grabbed two legs and a top and — well, it wouldn’t fit. There a lot of trouble-shooting. Punch fountains get plugged up with pulp. No pineapple. All pineapple has pulp. And some brides can be weird. Everything – everything – has to match. I was quoted once in a bridal tab story saying brides want everything to match — right down to their underwear. And it’s true.
Q: Brides can be … fussy?
Sure. Colors are important and it goes in cycles. In the old days it was periwinkle. There was nothing available in periwinkle and everyone wanted periwinkle. Some, if it’s rose, it has to be a certain color of rose. They’re into fancy linen now, all colors and textures. Brown and coral is big. We have our own white linen in stock, but we subrent from a company now that has four locations. We love it. We don’t have to wash them, we just count them and send them back. I just can’t afford to have linen in this range of colors and textures. Now we have so many choices — shear, crushed organza, satin – anything.
Q: What other trends have you noticed?
A lot of weddings now have a kids’ corner. There’s special foods and activities. They get piñatas, hire a clown, rent the popcorn and cotton candy machines. And then, of course, you’ll have some couples who say on the invitations: No kids. And the new big thing is the chocolate fountain. Everyone wants one. There’s a company locally that just does chocolate fountains.
Q: What about you own wedding 16 years ago?
Well, I was marrying into the family business. The ceremony was at the Mormon Church and the reception at Carson Memorial [now the Teen Center]. It was a nice place for a reception. The girls here at the Party Place wanted to do something real fancy so they hung globe lights and used balloons to make a huge canopy over the dance floor. It was beautiful.
With This Bling…
By Jody Rusconi
Graduate Gemologist GIA, Certified Gemologist AGS, and former owner of Graystone Jewelers
You are planning the perfect wedding, even if you have not yet found the perfect spouse. Fair enough; research the dress, think about where and what season to have this perfect event, but long after the moments are in the photo albums, your dress is in the attic and the food is a mere memory, your wedding jewelry will be on your hands.
Your engagement ring announces the beginning of your engagement, your wedding bands symbolize the culmination of your dream, and yet sometimes these all-important symbols of your perfect day can be less than perfect. Humboldt County jewelers are successful because they repeatedly fulfill the desires of their customers. They recognize that every bride puts a great deal of importance on not only how and when the ring is given, but its history as well. Although Internet shopping is very tempting to you grooms, are you sure that you want to be telling someone that you love; “I got a real deal on this,” rather than “I wanted you to have the very best?” Not only does the Internet take away this most important sentiment, but when you have troubles or questions where do you go? Just like everything else, it’s cheap for a reason. After you receive your jewelry and they’ve taken your money, you are no longer their concern.
Another source for wedding jewelry is through the family. A grandmothers wedding set, a diamond from a great-aunt — they carry memories for some brides and grooms that are very important. There is, however, a possibility for the bride to be a bit disappointed in an inherited diamond. Many feel the need to have a diamond of their very own, even if a family diamond is stunning. A few well-placed questions to the bride will prevent any disappointments. Redesigning an existing diamond ring may offend some family members but it can also produce a finished piece of jewelry that is much more pleasing and comfortable for the new bride. Again, be sure that you involve yourselves in each step of a redesigned diamond ring — this will better ensure your complete satisfaction.
What is it about an engagement ring, a wedding set or band that appeals to you? Remember, your plan is to wear this ring for the rest of your life. Will your design hold up well with your lifestyle? Will a dramatic high setting become annoying as you start a family? Will that fancy-cut diamond perform and remain brilliant and sparkling even when you haven’t had time to clean it? Pavé diamonds are delightful, but the designs necessitate multiple tiny prongs that need checking and upkeep. Is the ring design you want a fashion statement that may become dated in ten years, or a classic that your children will cherish?
From engagement rings to wedding bands, bridesmaid’s gifts to accents for the bride on her special day, your local Humboldt County jewelers will listen to all of your needs. After the purchase they will service, appraise, clean, repair and size when necessary. Very frequently they will redesign or trade in and upgrade their diamonds that were “spectacular” to the new bride but become “sweet” or “dainty” with time. Remember, tastes change as time changes. What works on your hand as a young girl may not flatter you as you mature. Be sure this most important ring is one that deserves the memories of both your perfect day and of your lives together.
Wedding Bands
By Bob Doran
No, not the golden rings you place on each other’s fingers, the band you’ll hire to make for nuptials into a party where your guests dance.
It’s generally a good gig for the musicians. The pay is better than in bars, and the audience is predisposed to be happy and have a good time.
Ross Rowley, bass player/vocalist for The Delta Nationals and a former member of Humboldt’s country stalwarts The Roadmasters, figures he’s played a hundred weddings in the three decades he’s been playing music locally.
“We ask couples to please come out and watch the band before you hire us,” he notes. “See if what we play is really what you want. Perhaps they want nice background instrumental music and not swing tunes meant for dancing.” In that case you might want to look elsewhere.
“Couples also tend to hire us to please their parents. While that makes both us and the parents happy, sometimes the young people feel left out. It’s kind of the reverse of what it was 20 years ago, when the old people would get up and leave as soon as the band starts. With The Delta Nationals, the older people are the ones up and dancing and showing the young folks a thing or two.”
Recalling his days as a Roadmaster, Rowley says he figures the country music industry creed includes a requirement for new wedding songs each year. “We would always have to learn the latest country wedding songs. Most couples seemed to consider the current one ‘their’ song, including ‘She Thinks My Tractor’s Sexy,’ ‘John Deere Green’ and ‘I’ve Got Friends In Low Places,’ and so on. (I’m not making these titles up.)”
Concerning requests, he says, “A lot of the time, the couples will pick songs that are nowhere near the genre the band normally covers. I really hate brides’ magazines for inspiring them to want a band like The Delta Nationals to do ‘Celebrate’ by Kool and The Gang. We kindly say no.”
While drummer/bandleader Michael Curran mostly plays jazz, he feels that a band should be flexible and play whatever the bride and groom want to
hear. He recalls a wedding at a local winery where he was playing with keyboardist John Raczka and trumpet Sam Maez. “The couple had brought their entire family all the way from Michigan. They had this cake that must have cost a fortune. It was four feet tall, eight or nine layers high. They had asked us to play some K.C. and the Sunshine Band, so we were playing ‘Get Down Tonight.’ Everybody was into it, jumping up and down dancing, just pounding the floor, and the cake started to take a tumble.
“The wedding planner, who was overseeing this incredibly frou-frou wedding, was this kind of prissy guy, on top of every detail. When the cake started to take a dive, he jumped in, grabbing pieces of it, trying to throw it onto plates to save it. It was a huge disaster, but it was so funny — the guy was on his knees with cake all over his expensive suit, trying to save the day.”
Rowley emphasizes the importance of pacing. “Usually we like to start off slow and quiet while families visit and people mingle. We were doing our usual performance for a typical wedding and although people weren’t dancing to our music we didn’t take great offense. It happens a fair amount of the time, especially during daytime weddings. So after our one-hour set we announce we are going to take a little break.
“No sooner did we break, than one of the groomsmen backs his giant 4x4 truck up to the outside dance area, opens both doors and proceeds to crank a Lynryd Skynyrd tape as loud as it can go, while announcing to the crowd, ‘Let’s get this party started!’
“Of course, what should happen — the entire reception flocks to the dance floor and boogies to their heart’s content. The father of the bride comes up to us and, after saying a few disparaging words about the drunken groomsman, proceeds to pay us for the day and says you might as well go home early. We did.”
These stories were featured in the 1998 North Coast Journal Bridal Section
Capturing the Day on Film
The dress is gorgeous, the flowers are at the peak of freshness. Friends and family are dressed in their finery and gathered together for one of the most special of occasions.
But without a reliable photographer memories fade and the thousands of dollars poured into a wedding day are all but lost.
After taking care of all the details surrounding a couple’s nuptials, it all comes down to the photography, say those who take pictures for a living. It’s a self-serving statement, admits Eureka photographer Tina Mori, but after shooting hundreds of weddings she’s convinced it’s accurate.
The photos “are going to be what a couple looks back on and remembers their day by,” Mori said. “I try to tell a story, so that you can look at the photographs and feel you may have been there. It’s like watching a movie.”
Locally, the price for a professional wedding photographer can be as high as $2,100 or as low as $700. It all depends on the couple’s budget and what they’re looking for in the final product — the wedding album.
The process of choosing a photographer sh0tlld begin one year prior to the wedding date especially if a couple plans to be married during the height 6f “wedding season,” June through September.
Photographer Marlene “Mamie” Nunnemaker never books a wedding over the phone. That, she said, is because it’s important for a couple to feel comfortable with their photographer.
“Personality is as important as the photography,” she said. “I want to get to know the couple. I don’t want to show up to the wedding and stick a camera in their face and expect beautiful images.”
Mori and Arcata photographer Philip Dresser agreed.
It’s essential, said Dresser, for the couple to find “somebody they are just kind of able to click with” — no pun intended.
Nunnemaker sees part of her job as that of a “go-between.”
She does that, she said, by listening and really paying attention to the bride. She recalled one wedding where the bride was being tormented by her brothers. Nunnemaker pulled the women aside, had her take a deep breath and remember that it was her day, not her siblings’.
“The photographer needs to know what’s going on” in terms of family relationships. There can be a lot of emotional baggage you’re dealing with,” said Dresser, owner of Philip’s Camera & Studio in Arcata.
Through her business, Mori, owner of Tina’s Photography in Eureka, has developed friendships that have lasted through first as well as second weddings.
Aside from personalities, couples should examine a photographer’s work for quality, such as the lighting. They should ask for references and make sure they know exactly what comes in their photo package. And it’s certainly not out of line to ask a photographer if they enjoy their work.
A happy photographer is going to be more creative, take the time needed for good shots and simply care about the final product, said Mori
Style is also important, said Nunnemaker, who has been known to buy a bottle of cheap champagne for the groomsmen, have them shake it up and let the bubbly fly — all for the sake of a good shot.
Does the couple want a traditional wedding album with more posed shots, or is a candid, journalistic style preferred? It’s essential, say the experts, to make sure the photographer is capable and willing to take the type of photos envisioned.
“What you do is give them what they expected, what they want and what they dreamed about,” said Mori. “You need to tell the story for the person through their eyes.”
“One of the first things I ask is what they’ve seen in their friends’ albums that they absolutely love, and also what they don’t like,” said Nunnemaker, owner of Mamie’s Photography in Fortuna.
After meeting with a potential photographer, the bride and groom should know exactly how many shots they will get for their money, what type of shots they will get and how much of the reception the photographer will shoot. Some photographers edit the photos themselves and choose the final shots to go in the wedding album, while others allow the couple to pick which photos they’d like enlarged.
Once wedding albums are complete, Nunnemaker hands over all original prints to the newlyweds. But that’s unusual. And on the West Coast, the experts say, it’s all but unheard of for photographers to provide their negatives. That practice is, however, gaining popularity on the East Coast for a price, a high price. Dresser will sell his negatives, but not until two years after the wedding day.
In the end, having a completed album within several months of the wedding is a satisfying feeling, said Mori, who has known couples who tried to cut corners by doing a lot of the work themselves. The tab adds up, she said, and years later photos still aren’t properly arranged in albums.
With a professional, said Dresser, you know exactly what the cost will be, you know exactly what you’re getting and you don’t have to worry about organizing photos for enlargement and later arranging them in albums.
That’s important, said Mori, to avoid having nothing more than, a box of loose photos five, maybe even 20, years after the nuptials.
Planning Food for a Crowd
Serving food for large gatherings such as weddings may look simple and easy to do but time, effort and know-how are needed to achieve that end result. Here are a few
guidelines if you would like to do the food for a large party without a caterer.
Consider the occasion for the party (formal or informal), the location (inside or outside) and the time of day (snacks, lunch or dinner) and the number of people to be served. This will dictate the menu.
Make a list of the things you might like, then test it with some of the following questions.
• Are the items on the list in keeping with the event budget?
• Is it the type of food your guests will like?
• Can items on the menu be made ahead or frozen? Do you have refrigeration for the food once it is prepared?
• Once served will it look and taste good as the party progresses?
• Will leftovers be edible the day after (for example, dressed green salad would not, in which case the food would be wasted).
Labor-intensive dishes should be reserved for smaller parties, unless this is what you want and you have plenty of labor.
Balance, contrast, color and harmony are key elements of menu planning. To balance a menu, think in terms of categories: cheese, seafood, meat, vegetable and fruit. It isn’t necessary to use all. Consider fresh uncooked foods as well as cooked.
Contrasting color, texture, flavor and temperature make for a more interesting meal. Choose something crunchy, smooth, spicy, light and refreshing. Flavors in the dishes should rarely be duplicated. The final combination of dishes served should be compatible.
Attractive presentation is important.
Already prepared foods are helpful time and labor savers. Order large sealed bags of mixed salad greens. These are washed, dried and ready to serve. Serve dressing separately. No mixing labor is involved, guests can use the quantity they like, and leftovers are not wasted.
Purchase large bags of cooked meatballs and add a personal touch by simmering them in a savory homemade sauce. Buy large boxes of frozen miniature quiche. They can be heated as needed. Many foods items such as these are available at the grocery store in quantity.
Order fresh specialty breads or rolls to be picked up the day of the wedding. It’s filling, inexpensive and a good buffer for extending the quantity of food.
For a full meal, cook the entree on the spot. Engage someone to take charge of the grill. Fresh tuna, salmon or chicken breasts are good suggestions. For portion control, have someone serve. Add one or two salads and! or fresh fruit and bread to complete the menu. Keep it simple.
Engage lots of help for service, replenishing the serving table, clearing up dishes and cleanup. Better to have too much help than not enough. Collect serving pieces ahead of time. They should not be too large and should be replenished frequently so that the 50th guest in line, for example, is not confronted with a dish that looks as though it had been waded through. Make up two dishes of the same item and when one is almost empty replace it with a full one while the finished one is refilled.
Amounts can be tricky. Quantity usually depends on what is served and the number of dishes. More food is needed for self-serve meals. Weather can ‘also be an influence. In cold weather people tend to eat more and in hot weather drink more.
The size of side dishes does not need to be the same. For example, when preparing three salads for a crowd of 225 people prepare black bean salad for 50, rice salad for 75 and potato salad for 100. The thinking is that more people would be likely to take potato salad.
When increasing a standard favorite recipe to quantity, the rule is never double the seasoning. Many good books exist with help in quantity cooking. One is “Food for Fifty” by Fowler and West.
In the end you may decide to hire a caterer!
NEW POTATO SALAD
Yield: 1/3 cup servings for 50
15 pounds new potatoes, boiled and cut chunky
2 cups vinaigrette dressing
1-1/3 cups oil
2/3 cup vinegar
1-1/2 tablespoons salt
1 tablespoon dry mustard
1/2 pound red onions, peeled and finely chopped
2/3 cup mayonnaise
1-1/3 cups sour cream
2 bunches fresh dill, chopped
2 tablespoons celery seed
Marinate potatoes in vinaigrette dressing for two hours. Carefully mix in remaining ingredients to avoid mashing potatoes. Keep thoroughly chilled until serving.
BLACK BEAN SALAD
about 50 servings
5 pounds black beans, washed and soaked
6 each red, green and yellow bell peppers, diced
4 large red onions, peeled and diced
2-2/3 cup corn oil
1-1/3 cups lime juice or red wine vinegar
1-1/2 tablespoons salt
1/4 cup diced pickled jalapeno peppers (optional)
4 tablespoons garlic, minced
3 teaspoons cumin
2 bunches cilantro, chopped
Cook black beans until tender. Drain thoroughly and cool slightly. Add the rest of the ingredients and mix gently.
Let marinate several hours before serving.
Betty Thompson is a food writer, traveller and teaches cooking classes locally.
Plan(t) Ahead For Outdoor Weddings
Two years ago Bayside resident Lynn Wells took all the hard work she has put into her three-acre yard overlooking Jacoby Creek and created a special place for two garden weddings. Because she loves gardening and has her yard already filled with roses, perennials and an abundance of shrubbery, she had a big head start.
“One of the reasons one of the couples chose this place was they came to a party and saw the garden in its normal condition and just fell in love with it,” she said.
In most cases, producing a garden wedding at home is a project that requires planning if you wish to have success without added tension. Professional gardener Janet Czarnecki, who once even produced a January garden wedding for a client, suggests planning up to six months in advance.
“Because weddings are so crazy it is good to take care of the things you can take care of a few months before instead of the week before. It means sitting down and looking at when the wedding is going to be, and then counting backwards,” she said.
Czarnecki advises devising a plan and putting it on paper. Take care of all pruning, weeding and cleanup chores three months prior to the event. If you intend to plant annuals for flower color, she suggests planting 12 to 16 weeks in advance. “A garden is alive. It’s not something static; it is always growing and changing. That is why having a plan and starting early is crucial,” she said.
Wells planned the weddings in her yard in May and late July. “The May wedding wasn’t something I had to do a lot of preplanning for. At that time of year everything was looking good. The roses were blooming and the only thing I had to do, of course, was to have it look as good as it could. Fill in the empty spots with color. Things are really lush at that time of the year anyway,” she said.
For the July wedding Wells’ perennial garden required a bit more effort.
“It’s harder to have the garden looking nice in July. So as soon as the May wedding was over I hacked everything back. I just ruthlessly cut back the perennials like artemisia, feverfew, nepeta,” she said. After clipping back all perennials Wells watered and fertilized the garden routinely so that when the July wedding rolled around everything was in top shape.
Combining annuals and perennials in a garden can make summer weddings easier to plan, according to Czarnecki. “You have lots and lots of choices the later you go into the summer.”
The list of possibilities is extensive: alstroemeria, alyssum, Japanese anemones, borage, bachelor buttons cineraria, chrysanthemums, coreopsis, dahlias, delphiniums, erigeron, feverfew, forget-me-nots, geraniums, gladiolus, godetia, hollyhocks, hydrangeas, impatiens, johnny jump ups, larkspur, lavatera, lavender, linaria, lobelia, marigolds, montbretia, nemesia, nicotiana, penstemon, petunias, salvia, salpiglossis, scabiosa, snapdragons, statice, stock and zinnias.
Planning in advance also saves money when purchasing plants. “One thing you can do is buy plants small, in six packs, and put them in three months ahead. They will be blooming when the wedding happens,” Czarnecki said.
Using annuals in the garden is also a good way to compliment the wedding with special colors. “You need to ask what their (the couple’s) wedding colors are because a lot of times in a wedding, particularly in the summer, you can plan so that the annuals go with the colors of the wedding,” Wells explained.
In addition to getting the yard in shape, Wells suggests informing the neighbors about the wedding.
“We let the neighbors know ahead of time that there would be a wedding so they would not be alarmed about traffic and wonder what was going on. Neighbors let us use their field and we put a sign there for parking. Besides, if you are going to have a garden wedding you don’t necessarily want a lot of cars pulling into your yard much because you want the place to be peaceful and lovely,” she explained.
Wells found the experience of producing a garden wedding most rewarding.
“It is such a positive experience. Everybody is so happy and there are children and old people and it is a wonderful, wonderful experience. And in terms of preparing the yard, it is exciting because if you are really into gardening, you don’t really do much more than usual except that you do it a little better and get it neater,” she said ..
Both Wells and Czarnecki suggest seeking professional help if gardening is not your passion. “If you are not into the gardening aspect of it I would definitely seek the help of a professional gardener,” Wells said.
Czarnecki agreed. “A professional gardener can come up with a written plan, task by task, month by month. They can give you a map of what to do and when.”
Terry Kramer is a Bayside free-lance writer and owner of Jacoby Creek Nursery.
Ah, Sweet Wedded Bliss
You can’t help being impressed by the amount of sheer optimism demonstrated by those shiny young couples (and some not so young) whose posed pictures decorate the photo section of the newspaper. He’s working in his father’s rugshampooing business and she’s a sales associate at Sears. And yes, of course, they’re ready to get married.
Your own wedding is always your favorite. At mine — yes, believe it or not, I was married — there was considerable upfront negotiating over the fact that my intended was Jewish and I was not. His parents were distraught at the prospect of their son being married off by some priest. After much thought and soulsearching I allowed as how I would abandon my heritage if they wouldn’t mind paying for a nice wedding. To this day they probably don’t know that I’d have let myself be married by Liberace sooner than by a priest.
I was involved in a friend’s wedding that was a logistical nightmare. This was a full, formal wedding which meant six of us had to be wearing the same dress. I was still living in Hawaii, the bride and groom were in San Jose and the other attendants — who ranged in size from a petite 6 to a hefty 16 — were scattered around the West Coast.
Somehow we convened for a shopping trip and after visiting every mall in San Jose came to the conclusion that no manufacturer makes a dress that comes in both a 6 and a 16. Three weeks before the wedding, the word went out: We were going to make our dresses.
I can’t thread a needle, but thank God for sisters. We did our fitting over the phone — don’t ask how. By the time I got back to San Jose the dress was basted together, but I had to go straight to the chapel for The Rehearsal.
It was at this point I met the affable fellow with whom I was supposed to walk down the aisle. He was a nice enough guy, but I had a strange sense of foreboding. I knew Something Was Going To Happen.
The next day, we overslept and didn’t get the dress finished. We slapped it together with safety pins and off we went in the limo. No one knew. The walk down the aisle went fine and everyone sniffled during the ceremony. We smartly aboutfaced to follow the bride down the altar steps and out.
Then it happened. My escort tripped as he started down the steps.
Now I’d like to tell you that I was so quick-witted that I held onto his arm and kept him from making an embarrassing spectacle of himself. But the truth is that all I could think about was the fact that if he jerked on my arm, or if I made any sudden movements at all, the damn safety pins were going to give way. So I snatched my arm away and watched with the crowd as he tumbled arse over teakettle.
He was the highlight of the wedding video.
I had to leave the reception four or five times to keep pinning the dress together. But I imagine it was just as well we never actually finished sewing it. I really didn’t have any plans to wear it again.
The following stories were featured in the 1997 premiere ediiton of the North Coast Journal’s Bridal Edition
The First Step: Where Will the Wedding Be?
On a brisk morning last August, about 40 people trudged through the darkness onto Clam Beach. As a flute played a wistful melody, they gathered in a circle and held hands while Cindy and Pete Carlin became husband and wife. The couple kissed just as the sun rose above the hills to the east.
“I’ve always had a vision of getting married on the beach at sunrise,” said Cindy. “And luckily, Pete loved the idea, too.” After some singing and a toast, the party headed to their McKinleyville home for a breakfast reception.
Whether you want to get up at dawn and get married on a chilly, windswept beach or plan something more traditional, you’ll discover a wide array of venues, indoors and out, in Humboldt County.
Some couples, like Cindy and Pete, have something specific in mind. But most will need to think through a few questions to find the right location. Deciding how much you can or want to spend is the first consideration. You’ll also want to know: Do you prefer indoors or outside? How many guests will you invite? Will you want live music and will the band need electricity? What kind of food do you plan to serve? Would you like a formal setting or a more casual one?
It’s not hard to find spectacular outdoor settings in Humboldt County. About 40 couples a year follow local tradition and head for the ocean view of Wedding Rock in Patrick’s Point State Park.
“During the summer, we usually have several weddings each weekend,” said Alan Wilkinson, public information officer for the park. “If you just go up to the rock with a minister or justice of the peace and a few friends and do basically what a normal visitor would do, you won’t need any permits or have to pay any fees. If it will be more than that, you should talk to the park staff.”.
Others who hold their nuptials at Patrick’s Point use the Red Alder group day-use area. Aside from being out of the wind and on flat terrain, it offers a kitchen, restrooms, lots of tables, rain shelter and a large grassy area for $150 a day. You’ll need to reserve early as the site fills quickly.
One more nice spot in the park is Ceremonial Rock. Though it does not have a kitchen or rain shelter it has a beautiful view and large grassy plain. “A lot of couples get married at Wedding Rock and then come down to Red Alder or Ceremonial Rock for the reception,” said Wilkinson. For more information call 667-3570.
Another popular outdoor site is Fortuna’s Rohner Park. “Many couples go up to the scenic loop and get married at the top of the hill under the trees,” said park staffer Joy Murphy. “Later they may have a reception in the large group picnic area.”
Along with seating for 400, there is a cook shack with a stove, refrigerator and serving window, and a large open outdoor fireplace. Included in the $75-$200 rental fee is a ballfield, volleyball area, playgrounds and tot lots. For a bit more, you can rent the adjacent roller skating rink either to skate or to set up for a dance. Call 725-7620 to learn more.
Pamplin Grove, a county park about 10 miles inland on Route 36, is a favorite not only because it sits right on the Van Duzen River, but because it offers warm weather. If you start early enough, you can reserve the whole campground for about $200. One couple reserved the camp an entire weekend for their wedding 10 years ago, and they rent it every year for an anniversary celebration. For information, call 445-7651.
Redwood Park in Arcata is host to dozens of weddings each year, most of them very informal. A few rent the lodge (not available in the summer) for $100, but most just have a picnic-type ceremony in the clearing or in one of the groves in the Community Forest above the park, according the city staffer Lona Bates. Contact the city at 822-7091 if you want to rent the lodge.
A few other locations where Humboldtians hold small, casual weddings are Freshwater Park, Moonstone Beach and Elk Head Bluff in Trinidad, Big Lagoon, Fern Canyon and Prairie Creek in Redwood State Park and other unnamed spots along the Trinity and Eel rivers, and various mountain tops. To use Freshwater Park you’ll need to be there to hold the first-come-first-served spots early in the morning.
If you’re thinking of getting married outdoors but want a more formal location with staff and, in some cases, catering, there are several facilities to select from.
Fern Cottage in Ferndale is a good choice for a western or English garden wedding with its pastoral fields, gazebo and l30-year-old Russ family farmhouse. They don’t cater but there are kitchen facilities. They accommodate as many as 400 and as few as 15, and charge $250 plus $1 a person for the facility. To learn more, call Virginia Dwight at 786-4735.
If you’d like to wed right on the beach, or on a patio directly overlooking it, and then stroll over to a catered meal, you may want to look into Merryman’s Restaurant on Moonstone Beach. There are several different spots to tie the knot on the property and also a beach house the reception and meal. Meals can be catered for up to 250 guests. The cost starts at $350 for the site. Call 677-3111 to find out the particulars.
Arrington Apples Orchard got into the wedding business by chance. “Some good friends wanted to hold their wedding in the orchard and of course we said okay. During the wedding, and for months after that, people kept asking us if we did weddings here. After a while we decided it would be a good idea,” said owner Janet Arrington.
Catering, decorating and even a hairdresser for the bride are available. “All the bride and groom have to do is show up and be beautiful,” Arrington said. Aside from the apple orchard and large lawn with gazebo that can accommodate about 300, there is a smaller site for indoor gatherings. The cost: a base price of $650 (less for under 50 guests) plus food and drink. If you’d like to know more, call 443-0210.
Another outdoor venue that will take care of all the details for you is the Fieldbrook Valley Winery. It features a large outdoor garden with ponds and a wine tasting room in a warm, inland location. There are canoes to paddle, croquet sets, and several tree houses for kids to play in.
The winery does not cater, but will help with arrangements. In case of rain, there is a tasting room that holds 40-50 people or, for larger groups, the staff arranges for a back-up facility. The base price of $900 (plus $2 a person) covers wedding planning and rehearsal, personnel and rental equipment. Call 839-4140 for further information.
For less hardy Humboldtians and their relatives, who may not want their wedding duds whipping in the wind, there are dozens of indoor sites from humble to luxurious.
Many couples, of course, get married in their church and hold their reception in a grange, veterans’ hall or a lodge. The advantage of such a location is the modest price; the challenge is to transform it into something other than a hall.
One easy way to create a matrimonial mood is to “plantscape” the hall by renting from a nursery. Add some flowers, nice tablecloths and fabric chair covers, adjust the lighting if necessary, and you’re ready to say “I do.” If needed, the staff may have ideas or can suggest consultants to help you.
The Arcata Community Center, the Monday Club in Fortuna, the Bayside Grange, Trinidad Town Hall, the Adorni Center in Eureka and McKinleyville’s new Azalea Hall in Pierson Park all rent their facilities for weddings. Each site has a hall for 200 to 300 people and a kitchen (up to 600 at Adorni Center). The cost: the least is $150, the most is $300. For more details, contact each site by calling the appropriate city hall or parks and recreation department or the number listed in the phone book.
Two slightly nicer venues in this category, which cost only slightly more, are the recently built Unitarian Universalist Fellowship in Bayside and Arcata’s Celebration Hall. The Unitarian facility offers a private outdoor patio with beautiful views and an indoor site accommodating 200 guests, along with a full kitchen, for about $350. Call Barbara Townsend at 677-3296 for details or to reserve the space that books up to a year in advance.
Celebration Hall features a fully equipped kitchen with service for 150, a carpeted stager candelabras and several smaller rooms for changing, gifts or whatever. The price of about $350 includes consulting services for your wedding. For information, call 822-1070.
For those couples looking for a locale that takes care of the whole wedding package, the Eureka Inn is a popular choice. This year about 190 couples had their nuptials at the historic inn that can accommodate parties of 35 to 400. The cost of $l5 per person for a buffet or $20 per person for a sit-down meal includes the ceremony itself, if desired. Talk to Lynn Solomon at 442-6441 to get the specifics.
The Victorian Village Inn in Ferndale boasts 16-foot ceilings and creates a romantic mood with Victorian roses on the tables, real crystal and Royal Dalton English Bone China. Many couples marry before the huge fireplace and later retreat to the Inn’s honeymoon suite. The site holds up to 300 guests, with a menu that accommodates both vegetarians and meat eaters. The $16 per person price includes the cake and just about everything else. For more information, call the new owner, Jan Jennings at 786-4949.
If you love redwood, you may want to tie the knot at the Scotia Inn which uses the wood from floor to ceiling in its light-filled rooms. You can hold the wedding indoors or by the outdoor gazebo for a cost which varies from $11 to $20 per person. The staff can refer you to outside vendors for the cake, flowers and other extras. Contact Mary Dishman at 764-S683 for details.
A bit farther south, the Benbow Inn hosts a wedding almost every summer weekend on its lower terrace that overlooks landscaped grounds and Benbow Lake. The price for the ceremony is $3S0 to $550 and starts at $20 per person for the reception. You may not want to leave on your honeymoon after a night in the Garden Cottage Bridal Suite with its own fireplace, jacuzzi and private patio. Talk to Yves Hansel at 923-2124 for more information.
Perhaps you seek a nautical nuptial adventure. Half a dozen marriages a year are performed on the decks of the Madaket. You can bring food aboard to serve up to 49 guests, use their bar or not, and even be wed by the ship’s captain. The boat leaves from C Street in Eureka and rents for $260 for the first hour and $100 for each hour thereafter. Call Darlene Hills at 445-1910 to learn more.
Or you may simply want to pick a site that has special meaning for you, like Janice and Jerry Peterson, who got married in front of Ramone’s Bakery in Arcata’s Uniontown Shopping Center.
“Though we’d known each other for years through mutual friends, it was in front of Ramone’s that we each found out that the other was available (for romance) again and exchanged phone numbers,” Jerry said. “And during the months we were dating, we were often in and out of Ramone’s.”
During the ceremony, one of the bakery workers came out and presented the couple with a gift-wrapped truffle to the applause of the 20 or so guests. For Janice and Jerry, it was just perfect.
Beyond Dishes And Sheets
Picture this: You walk around your favorite store picking out everything you want. “Let’s get two of those, and, oh, one of these would be really nice, and oh my God, we’ve gotta have that!”
Sound like a fantasy come true? Well, that’s what it’s like setting up a wedding registry.
More than half of the 850 couples who married in Humboldt County this year set up their bridal registry at traditional stores, such as Gottschalks Department Store or Robert’s. China, silver, crystal, linens and other household items are frequent choices. But many couples look beyond dishes and sheets. Like so many other wedding traditions, the bridal registry is being updated.
“We already had all the household things we needed. We’re both grown-ups,” said Maggie Gainer, who married Don Wolski at their Bayside home last July. “We weren’t even requesting gifts, but people kept asking us what we wanted. We knew we both really wanted to get a dog after we were married,” she said. So they registered at the Sunny Brae Animal Clinic.
“The staff was pretty surprised when we called to ask about setting it up, but they thought it was a great idea and figured out how to make it work for us,” Maggie said. The gifts sent to the Corgi Fund paid for not only the puppy but also shots, spaying, exams and all its health needs for years to come.
Evan Baxter and Carri Ratazzi, Humboldt State University seniors who are getting hitched Jan. 5, decided to register at two places. “We’re both 26 so we already have blenders and stuff. We registered at a department store so we could replace our crummy college dishes and get a few cool things like some pilsners and beer steins,” Evan said.
“But we both love to camp and backpack, and there’s a lot of things we wanted. We registered at Northern Mountain for a bigger tent, a camp stove, sleeping pad, water filter and other camping stuff.” They are not alone. Dozens of Humboldt’s betrothed register at camping and outdoor stores. “We had six or seven couples register here this year,” said Alan’ Agapinan, assistant manager at Northern Mountain Supply in Eureka. Adult toy items like canoes or kayaks, sleeping bags and pads and even climbing ropes are popular choices.
Robert Baker of Arcata’s Outdoor Store said several couples register at the store each year. The response from gift givers? “A lot of the older folks seem surprised and a little uncomfortable. Younger folks think it’s pretty coo!,” Baker said.
If you and your spouse-to-be need a table saw, sander or power drill, maybe you’ll want to join the 20 or so couples a year who register at Hensel’s Hardware in Arcata.
“People I’ve registered don’t seem to be that interested in crystal or china. They seem to register more for everyday items like mops, garbage cans and tools like hammers, crowbars and wire cutters,” said Theresa Bates, who’s been helping couples at Hensel’s for more than three years. “Power drills are actually pretty popular and a few have ordered a table saw,” Bates added.
Some duos select works of art and small furniture. Over 50 couples registered at Plaza Design this year. Popular items include candles and holders, mirrors with candle sconces, small wooden tables, fine art, picture frames and outdoor lanterns, according to staffer Bonnie Barnes.
Some traditional items such as dishes are also selected, but the choices at Plaza Design are apt to be one-of-a-kind ceramic pieces by North Coast artists, such as Peggy Loudon or Frances Boettcher, or Fire and Light’s unique dinnerware made of colored, recycled glass.
Other couples don’t pick things to register for at all. Instead they ask their family and friends to help pay for their honeymoon or other travels by registering with a travel agency.
“A lot of couples want experiences, not things to dust,” said Mary Lou Lorenson of Eureka Travel. Many who registered at her agency were entering their second marriage or already living together, according to Lorenson. Hawaii and the beach resorts of Mexico are the most popular choices.
Many who register at traditional locations like Gottschalks at the Bayshore Mall and Robert’s in Henderson Center are signing up for different things than the couples of several years ago. “Not everyone does China these days,” said Pattie Bowling, Gottschalks Bridal registrar. “Many are leading .a more casual lifestyle so they pick stoneware and bright-colored patterns instead.”
Evan Baxter put it this way, “Carri and I wanted stuff we could use 365 days a year, not 10.”
Dolores Rex, owner of Robert’s in Eureka, added, “Since so many couples are already set up with basic household goods, they register for fun things like pasta machines, gourmet foods and coffees, espresso makers and cup sets, and even things like wind chimes.”
Wherever you decide to set up your bridal registry, think it through and have a good time doing it. After all, your wedding is probably the only time in your adult lives when you get to pick exactly the gifts you want.
Symphony Of Selection
Music is the soul of a wedding, the glue that holds the pieces together — the flowers and the flounce, the cake and the coffee, the dress and the “I do’s.”
Yet finding just the right choice of music isn’t that easy: If you check the Humboldt County Yellow Pages under musicians, you’ll find only six listings. The church or hall you’re using may provide some leads, but what if your wedding is outdoors or at home?
And while you may have your heart set on a string quartet for the ceremony and a big dance band for the reception, cost may well limit your dreams.
The first thing most pairs planning their nuptials consider is music for the ceremony. A soloist can often strike just the right chord, can usually play an outdoor wedding and will cost less than a combo.
If you want piano or organ music, Dotty Flesher (822-3543) plays traditional wedding fare, processionals and recessionals, ballads and love songs. Dotty has a sliding scale between $50-$100 and has a keyboard for outdoor ceremonies.
Kenna Reed (443-0949) performs Christian, classical or contemporary music on the harp for $75-$100. For a Celtic harp, call Howdy Emerson (677-0384) who plays during ceremonies or receptions and can offer a Celtic wedding march for about $250.
If it’s acoustic guitar you want to serenade you down the aisle, Dave Trabue (442-2617) plays folk, pop or special requests for about $100. (He also joins mandolin player Sean Bohannon on occasion, at a rate of $150 to $200.)
“Despite its unruly reputation, the accordion can be a very beautiful instrument for a wedding ceremony,” according to the Accordion Man (839-4080). He can play anything from ethnic folk to Bach and Chopin, indoors or out, and charges $60 for the first hour and $50/hour after that.
Marla Joy (445-2106) plays any style flute, but especially likes classical Baroque, Celtic and jazz. The rate is about $75 an hour. (She also performs as a duo with Mike Conboy on guitar, for $125 an hour.)
If you want a quartet for your ceremony, try Good Company. The foursome (formerly a threesome called the Alder Trio) plays the traditional music of England, Ireland, Scotland, Wales and Brittany and has been a wedding favorite in Humboldt County for almost 10 years.
“We’ll play traditional wedding processionals or whatever the couple wants. And we can sing a capella, accompanied or not at all,” said Ann Marie Woolley (445-8451). Aside from the ceremonial music, they can perform English and Celtic country rounds for dancing. The cost: $300-$500.
Another source for solo musicians or informal duos, trios quartets is the Humboldt Symphony.
Once you’ve settled on the music for the rituals and toast! now it’s time to pick the beat that can move both your 10-year. old sister and your 70-year-old grandmother. Professional DJs cost about half the price of a full band and can switch from preceremony background music to the wedding march to foot stomping dance tunes in a flash. But if you want live dancing music, here’s a sampling of local groups from moderately priced, to high end.
The Delphinium Blue Trio performs danceable folk, country and rock featuring strong vocal harmonies and acoustic guitar. The trio charges about $500 and can also play during the ceremony. Contact Rachel Howe (825-8467) for more information.
“Blue Moon Swing puts its own “acoustic, electric swing” spin on songs from artists such as Eric Clapton, the Beatles and Bonnie Raitt. The group can perform with or without a drummer. Talk to Claudia Ariss (826-0636) and plan to pay about $500.
If you want to dance to a Cajun or Zydeco beat, call Marla joy (445-2106) and book the Bayou Swamis. It gets the audience involved by teaching the one-step, two-step, the waltz and line dances while they are playing and cost about $500.
The Arcata Horn Band is made up of eight local musicians who play dance musk of the ’20s, ’30s and ’40s. Brooks Otis (822-8354) can book the swing group which charges between $500-$700.
For vintage rock and roll, and rhythm and blues, try Buddy Brown and the Houndogs. The four person band has offered dance music for wedding revelers of all ages for more than a decade. Call Buddy, AKA Richard Duggins (668-5320), and count on spending between $500-$750.
The Heebee Geebies play dance rock and roll from the ’50s through the modern era. The band charges between $600 and $1,000 for weddings. Call Dave Perrier at 444-9031 for more information.
If your crowd craves country, here are some good choices in this genre.
The Roadmasters have been playing contemporary and old-time country music for 20 years in Humboldt County. The group will play at your wedding for about $500. Cheryl Eastteam (442-4052) can give you more information.
Country Fever is another band that performs classical and contemporary country tunes. Call Leah Dunn (443-0176) to book the group, which charges about $600 for four hours. Still Kicking offers modern country music with a twist for about $500. Contact Dave Trabue (442-2617) to learn more.
If you and your partner want a bluegrass flavor, try the Compost Mountain Boys. 1t plays traditional and contemporary bluegrass, including a few original tunes. Contact Sean Bohannon (4437611) to book the Boys, which feature twin fiddles and cost $300-$400.
At the high end of local groups is the Jewish Wedding Band. The nine-person group performs what it terms “Jewish Catskills Revival.” “We play a huge range of music with an emphasis on putting on a show and having a great time,” says band-member Joseph Byrd. “Our lead singer, Naomi Steinberg, likes to lead people in Jewish dances, whether they’re Jewish or not.”
Steinberg is also a rabbi and can perform the ceremony as part of the package, if desired. For bookings, call Benie Bennett (839-4080) and plan to pay about $1,400.
If none of the choices are in tune with your needs, you could always do what John Gullam and Denise Fitzgerald did for their July 6 wedding: invite the Humboldt State University Marching Lumberjacks. John said, “We like their style of music and, well, they’re our friends.”
Elizabeth Conner is a writer and non-profit management consultant who can plan just about any type of event — including weddings.
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6-9 p.m. Mischief Lab, 1041 F St., Arcata. Twice weekly meeting promoting "the art of spinning." Stay healthy while spinning poi, hula-hoop, staff, fans, and many more unique “tools.”. E-mail chakeetz@hotmail.com. 677-3188.
theater / 8 p.m. Redwood Curtain, 220 First St., Eureka. Quirky romantic comedy written by Deborah Zoe Laufer about a third-generation fortune teller from Brooklyn whose lovelife is lacking. Directed by Jyl Hewston. 443-7688.
art / 10 a.m. Hagopian Gallery, 1313 3rd St., Eureka. Display of varying styles of artwork running through Sept. 29.
music / 6:30-9:30 p.m. Persimmons Garden Gallery, 1055 Redway Drive, Redway. Straight ahead jazz outside in the legendary Persimmons garden, by the Michael Curran Jazz Group. www.persimmons.net/persimmons_garden_gallery.html. 923-9237.
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