the town dandy / By Hank Sims

Torrent of Bits

(June 5, 2008)  Last week we noted that the paranoid and paranoia-inducing machinery of Humboldt County politics seemed to have mellowed this cycle. Where were all the shady front groups? Where was the dirty money? Where were the outlandish rumors and whisper campaigns? Did the election even happen?

Just as we were starting to suspect it was all an Ecstasy flashback, someone came along and dashed a mug of ice water into our face. It came in the form of a talking point, one clearly invented by some crafty person in the Second District (or a friend) and intended for distribution in the last few days of the election. And here it was, the last few days of the election, and suddenly it was on everyone’s lips. It rang out on the blogs and on the radio and in the letters-to-the-editor page of the Times-Standard.

“A vote for [the late] Roger Rodoni,” it said, “is not a vote for Johanna Rodoni. It’s a vote for [Gov.] Arnold Schwarzenegger! Or maybe for [Eureka kazillionaire] Rob Arkley! Or for [Friend of Arkley and former supervisorial candidate] Nancy Flemming!For someone scary, in any case! Be very scared!”

The factual foundation for this amusing whisper campaign is not difficult to recap. Rodoni died before his name could be taken off the ballot. If he won the election, Gov. Schwarzenegger would be charged to appoint a replacement. All true. After that, consumers of the campaign were asked to strap in for a nice long ride on the crazy train. See, Arkley — a person who remains omnipotent in the popular imagination, despite his several recent political failures — Arkley controls Schwarzenegger! Plays him like a fiddle!

What was left out of the equation was why Schwarzenegger would bother to appoint anyone but Rodoni’s wife, Johanna Rodoni — or, if you’re willing to go this far, why Arkley would object. Schwarzenegger had already appointed Johanna Rodoni to fill out her late husband’s current term, after all, and she would be the pick of the overwhelming majority of folks who ticked Roger Rodoni’s name on Tuesday. She’s a solid Republican, and has served as a member of the local party’s central committee. Flemming’s name was thrown into the mix to up the fright factor, but though Flemming currently serves as the city manager of Rio Dell she doesn’t even live in the Second District.

Johanna Rodoni herself unwittingly added fuel to the fire when she told the Times-Standard that she would be willing to serve in her husband’s stead if the governor chose to appoint her. “A big if,” she said. This was plainly recognizable as common humility — you don’t promise that someone else will pick you — but those who wanted to believe were unwilling or unable to recognize it as such. They took it as another clue to the swirling chasm of conspiracy that surrounded this matter, and their lives.

In the annals of Humboldt County dirty tricks, this one probably doesn’t even rate in the top 100. But hey, maybe it worked. Check the election night returns elsewhere in this paper for clues.

Jud Ellinwood is a serious man, and he has a simple mission. For the last several months, he has been urging the Eureka Times-Standard — the region’s largest daily newspaper — to reduce the amount of plastic waste it foists upon the lawns of subscribers. Recently he read a T-S editorial entitled “Living Green Year-Round,” which was in one of the paper’s Earth Week editions. “We should all examine our lifestyles, and start viewing the world through green-colored glasses,” the editorial read.

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