Best Bakery 

• Photo by Heidi Walters
• Café Brio

We need to do a little intervention here first, folks, to deal with the whiner who "voted" in this category with the question, "Are you trying to make me cry?" Hey, weepy: Get a grip! I've cried my way through the ciabatta at Loleta, cried my way through the apple pandowdy at Ramones, cried my way through the foot-high frosting on those Mity Nice cupcakes -- and then cried inconsolably when that place closed (and cried again, hysterically, when I heard they were opening again in a new location!). I've cried through umpteen scrumptious baked goods at these and other bakeries up and down this county, sheer joy pumping from my tear ducts. Do you hear me complaining? No.

I confess, though, that I almost called the cops the other day when I ordered the sea-salted chocolate "chip" cookie at Brio -- an item called "amazing" by another voter. Chips? More like planks, layered craftily amid the soft, dense foundation. And the cookie could have made a nice hat, it was so big. I was crying so hard as I crammed it into my mouth, I couldn't see to dial 911 to rescue me.

Humboldt bakeries, all of you: Somewhere, someone is crying your praises. But this time around, Café Brio -- which also makes tearjerkingly awesome bread and heartbreakingly gorgeous pastries -- takes the cake as the best bakery.

The Breakdown: Brio 32.6%, Ramone’s 32.3%, Loleta Bakery 14.8%, Vellutini’s Baking Company 6.6%, Los Bagels 2.6%. Category popularity: Sixth.