Prepare for sudden stops, turns and slow-downs on Fourth Street in Eureka. Humboldt locals Michael Williams and Tao Chan are resurrecting that little drive-thru kiosk shop (Mary Hana's florist/juice bar/Indian take-out, Nikki's Crab Stand) as Bikini Brews, a java pitstop with scantily clad baristas and Muddy Waters coffee. Sure, roll your eyes, but the Tip Top isn't open for breakfast. It's not the first in the biz (see: Bottoms Up in Modesto, Calif.; XXX Espresso in Spokane, Wash.; the Peek-A-Brew franchise). It's like a bikini car wash, only with scalding hot coffee. Should be fine.
Bikini Brews won't be percolating until later this spring, but if you like your barista job and just wish there was more leering, it's hiring. Sorry, no dudes. Other than that, the only real requirement according to Williams is that you are "comfortable working in a bikini." Not so much emphasis on the brewing skills. Williams says that, unlike at more risqué shops, you won't have to wear pasties or lingerie since it will be "a little more conservative." The call for applicants on its Facebook page promises "a fun (and well heated!) environment." One hopes.
And remember folks: Nothing actually happens in the Cappuccino Room.