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March 15, 2007

Can We Survive The Syndrome?
by BOB
DORAN
If somehow I've conveyed
to readers that I disrespect restaurants, I've expressed myself
badly. When we go to a new restaurant, we do so with optimism.
True, we do not eat out often, as we are ourselves cooks, but
when we discover a place we like, we tell everyone -- because
we know all about the fatal disorder I call "Humboldt Restaurant
Syndrome." The county is littered with the bones of interesting
restaurants that failed not because they were bad, but because
nobody came. Usually, they were atypical, excellent and deemed
"too expensive."
The Myrtletown steakhouse with addictive thin crispy
wisps of onion rings, the eccentric Eureka bakery that changed
everything daily, the Southeast Asian pan-ethnic restaurant,
the tiny Indian restaurant jammed into a cheap motel, the Spanish
tapatia in Sunnybrae with breathtaking inventions, the
Rio Dell diner so remarkable I wrote about it for a national
periodical -- victims all to a lack of community support. Meanwhile,
the rapacious chains thrive. Humboldt Restaurant Syndrome.
Our own short-lived venture, The Byrd House, featured
American regional cooking (this was a decade before Bradley Ogden's
Lark Creek Inn became a hit in the Bay Area, so clearly it was
poor timing for Humboldt County). One of our lunch specialties
was baked macaroni and cheese. A secret formula, with three cheeses,
chunks of ham, and house-made rigatoni, priced at $4.75 -- it
was cosmic, if I do say so myself. It did not sell. One customer
was even offended seeing it on the menu. "Five dollars for
macaroni and cheese?" she sneered. "I can get Kraft
Dinner for a dollar at Safeway!"
At the root of Humboldt Restaurant Syndrome is
the idea that the customer should only be paying just a bit more
than the cost of the ingredients, a basic mistake in economics.
(According to the industry magazine Restaurant Report,
"A profitable restaurant typically generates a 28 percent
to 35 percent food cost.") Most people have no clue as to
the difference between quality ingredients and the kind that
come from the wholesale food place in a No. 10 can. Or the difference
between a true Hollandaise sauce and one that comes in a pouch
(just add boiling water). To many locals, price is the sole determinant.
Within the past two years, there have been two
different examples of the Syndrome in a small area of north Arcata.
In the first instance, a well-capitalized Asian buffet restaurant
opened in a prime location. Its large area was well-designed,
with comfortable booths, long tables for large groups and a separate
room for parties. Decor was spare but not stark. A coterie of
young women -- most of whom spoke little English -- looked after
the tables, supervised by a pair of highly competent women who
clearly had family restaurant backgrounds. The food was a vast
mix of commercial (deep-fried and mass-produced items) with house-cooked
(a wide variety of chicken used in traditional dishes like sweet-and-sour,
with a few pork and beef entrees included), plus a counter with
a sushi chef and a to-order stir-fry cook (a jar encouraged tipping).
The quality was uneven, but on the whole, by choosing
house-made items rather than frozen, a very decent Chinese meal
could be selected -- and at a very reasonable price. The place
was usually packed; in a sit-down restaurant that might mean
waits and hasty service, but the cafeteria situation actually
helped, because steaming trays of new food had to be brought
out regularly from the kitchen. It was a model for mass-producing
food at low prices.
After about a year, however, things changed. The
women managers gave way to grim-looking young men in tailored
silk suits, presumably indicating a shift in management. At that
point the variety plummeted. The quality of the food went from
OK to barely adequate: Beef was tough, pork dry, shrimp tasteless.
The sauces became dull, and as the flavors fell, the sugar and
oil content rose. The food deteriorated to the lowest common
denominator of all-you-can-eat for $11. And the result? If anything,
the place is even more popular. All-you-can-eat is big in Humboldt
County. Many people seem not to care what they eat if there's
lots of it, cheap.
In
the second example, a small market called McIntosh Farm
Country Store was started in the winter of '05 by a Willow
Creek family. It aimed to provide an outlet for year-round produce
from the family farm and from some of the same farmers who sell
at the Farmers' Market during the summer. A shoestring operation
(which still involved a multi-thousand dollar investment), undercapitalized,
not well advertised and in an unpromising location, they nevertheless
persevered. A display case was added for home-baked goods (frosted
banana bread slices, $1.50), and shelves of homemade pickles
and preserves. A pint jar of dilled green beans went for $8,
but was organic, the beans bursting with flavor. Sometimes there
were farm-fresh eggs, sometimes not, and when they did have them
they were expensive. Folk art was featured in an adjoining area.
It was a little scattered and very personal.
After a year, a breakfast/sandwich kitchen and
coffee bar were completed. The extended family were brought in,
kids learning to work the register and do prep. The menu is tiny,
but they now feature locally smoked beef and pork, in splendid
sandwiches that can include organic vegetables, grilled onions
and other custom options. The tri-tip sandwich ($7) seems expensive
compared with lunch stands, but made on house-baked bread or
Brio, and large enough to feed the two of us, it's actually a
bargain lunch. (On Fridays you'll find Rob Dunn of Wild Oaks
Grill out front grilling his Santa Maria-style barbecued tri-tip,
pork roast and ribs.)
Tables have been added for in-house diners, but
more often it's take-out for people at the nearby industrial
park or those in the know. Asking when they were getting more
tables, I was told, "When we can afford to."
Theirs is a large undertaking for a working farm
family. If Grandma is sick, the bakery case is empty; if Mom
has a school conference, she has to stay up late to do the books.
And six days a week, there's a commute from and to Willow Creek.
The restaurant business is full of success stories
built around the advantage of having the whole family working.
But what happens when the daughter leaves for UC Davis, and the
son joins the Coast Guard? Add a payroll, and they'd be out of
business in short order.
Can a small restaurant be run strictly as a business
and actually serve good food? Yes, but only with hands-on management.
Food service jobs pay poorly, and there's no margin for health
insurance, so turnover is high. This is why so many places have
to resort to commercial soups, chili, salsa and salad dressings,
frozen French fries, chicken-fried steak and chicken patties.
There simply isn't prep time to make the large menu customers
demand.
Will McIntosh survive? Ultimately it all
comes back to customer support. Until we are willing to pay for
quality, until we are willing to make that short drive to Valley
West for a quality sandwich and until we stop rewarding bad restaurants
simply because they are cheap, we are the reason for Humboldt
Restaurant Syndrome.
McIntosh Farm Country Store is at 1264
Giuntoli Lane in Valley West, Arcata, right across from TP Tire.
They serve breakfast and lunch, Monday through Friday 8 a.m.
- 6 p.m. and Saturdays from 8 a.m. - 4 p.m. 822-0487.

In a previous column on artisan cheesemakers ("Talk of the Table"
Jan. 25) I wrote about the remarkable blue cheese varieties
of Rogue Creamery in Oregon. Prior to the column's going to press,
I'd been assured that Murphy's Market in Sunnybrae would carry
several of them. Alas, by no fault of Murphy's, the distributors
could not deliver. I received gentle reminders from readers for
several weeks, and at one point was despairing that the cheese
might never come. Finally, having resorted to UPS Overnight shipping,
Murphy's has five varieties on the shelves this week. I am grateful
for their continued efforts, and I apologize to all who were
disappointed.
ROGUE CREAMERY CHEESES (Joseph's
recommendations)
Oregon Blue Vein -- classic Roquefort-style, versatile
Oregonzola -- a higher-fat, creamy Italian-style blue
Crater Lake Blue -- intense, tart, and complex
X-Sharp Cheddar -- classic, aged for three years (from
pasteurized milk)
Joseph Byrd is researching an article on Humboldt
burger joints and lunch spots.
If you have a favorite, write him at eat.your.spinach@gmail.com.

your
Talk of the Table comments, recipes and ideas to Bob Doran.
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